Okay, two things wrong with this fanfic. One morally wrong, one just my own issue.
1) Rachel is a 13 year old girl!!!! Lol. Dude, thats molestation you're promoting in your story. Seriously, when she told the guy she was 13 thats when i flipped and remembered how old these kids were. And it is kinda sickening. I didn't want to imagine a 13 yr old Rachel having sex with an older guy, and then get gangbanged, come on!
Here's a suggestion. Y not have Ax acquire the DNA of another chic? Another hooker on the street, or someone he accidently runs into during a mission, or at the mall or SOMETHING. Rachel the 13 yr old is soo so sooo wrong. Im not feelin the idea of him using Rachel up like that. Especially when some dude on the steet will be able to recognize her and mistake her for Ax the ****. That would actually be a funny scene to write in. Rachel would go off on him. Please give Ax a different chic morph. Thats all Im askin man. I remember Tobias morphing Taylor. Somethin like that...
2) Im African-American, so i was a bit disappointed to see you describe the "shady side of town" as being populated by "dark-skinned like Cassie and light skinned like Marco" people. Its like saying all blks and latinos are prostitutes, pimps, drug dealers but whites and everyone else are squeaky clean. Seems a bit wrong.
And finally...
“I asked whether you were looking to mate or not,” I said back to him. “If so, I would like you to mate with me. I don’t have much experience, but I should be able to satisfy you. The males that I have mated with before always seemed satisfied afterwards.”
“Talking is by far my worst component when it comes to mating,” I replied, “I promise that I’ll do much better with the other components.” I gave a small pause before saying, “So, do you want to mate with me?”
^^^Which is by far the funniest **** I've ever heard. I nearly died. Almost fell out of my chair laughing. Imagining Ax in Rachel morph saying this **** to a thug. Priceless.