Author Topic: Things the Animorphs (and other characters) would never say  (Read 158425 times)

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Offline TobiasMasonPark

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Re: Things the Animorphs (and other characters) would never say
« Reply #2010 on: June 13, 2013, 08:11:01 PM »
     The Animorphs...and Ax are meeting at Cassie's barn at the time of the Visitor

     Rachel: And that's why we've got to save Melissa.

     Jake: I think that's dumb, and here's why: how long has it been since you've spoken to Melissa? I mean, are you guys even still friends?

     Cassie: Well, no one should become a Controller, Jake.

     Jake: Agreed. I'm just saying...after such a grand epic adventure we had from book one, sneaking into a guy's house doesn't seem very thrilling. I mean, from a story telling POV.

     Tobias: Seriously, what are these books everyone keeps mentioning.

     Rachel: Jake. This is my book. I'm doing the narration. I say I'm morphing a cat and cuddling with my old friend...Also, f'ck you for yelling at me for nearly getting sexually assaulted.

     Some time later, during the events of the Secret

     Cassie: And that's why we need to stop the Yeerks from building a logging company and killing trees.

     Jake: There we go again with the anti-climactic adventures. Really? Skunks? That's not even the cover morph! What's the big deal if the Yeerks get to cut down trees?

     Cassie: Jake. It's my book. If I want to--

     Jake: Yea, yea. Let's go, then.

     Tobias: Seriously guys...Do you think we're in a book?

     Some more time later, during the events of the Unknown

     Cassie: And that's why we--

     Jake: No. That's it. You're finished, Cassie. Your last few narrations have just really sucked. I mean, it seems like everyone's pulling their weight except for you! Rachel's redeemed herself for the Visitor. Tobias gets his existential crisis--and his morphing powers back-- Marco has his whole mommy thing, Ax has stepping out of his brother's shadow and learning to live amongst humans, and I have my struggle as a leader and angst about my brother being a controller. YOU have adventures with dolphins, spraying Visser Three with skunk piss, and now alien toilets. NO MORE, Cassie. No more. You are no longer allowed to narrate an Animorphs book. I swear, I'm convinced YOUR narration is the reason the story is progressing so slowly.

     Tobias: For the last time! Am I the only one here who DOESN'T think we're all characters in a kids series?
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Offline Aluminator (Kit)

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Re: Things the Animorphs (and other characters) would never say
« Reply #2011 on: June 13, 2013, 11:54:46 PM »
*Jake jogs up the ramp and into the ship. There, sitting in the middle of the floor, is a large blue phone booth.

Funny and welld one, but you do know it's a Police Box and not a phone booth right?

Glad somebody caught what I was going for there ^_^ And a Police Box is totally a phone booth. It's just one that only connects to the police, or is used by the police. Relic of the 50's and 60's in England, for the most part, which is great for Doctor Who. From what I know, they were common when the series first aired, but the stuck chameleon circuit combined with the eventual obsolescence of the police boxes themselves has made the TARDIS a pretty unique object.

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Offline Falco tinnunculus

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Re: Things the Animorphs (and other characters) would never say
« Reply #2012 on: June 14, 2013, 02:37:36 AM »
[During the final mission]

Jake:"Full emergency power to the engines......"

(Everyone silence)

"......And ready the quantum torpedoes."

NateSean

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Re: Things the Animorphs (and other characters) would never say
« Reply #2013 on: June 14, 2013, 06:00:11 AM »
Police Box is totally a phone booth.

They're more like mobile police stations. The phone was in a compartment on the outside of the box that anyone could use, unlike phone booths where the phone is located inside the box.

Quote
Relic of the 50's and 60's in England, for the most part, which is great for Doctor Who.

They weren't unique to England. It's just that people (myself included) tend to associate the police box with England because of it's iconic status.

Anyway, I don't want to hijack this thread. Just had to geek out.

Offline TobiasMasonPark

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Re: Things the Animorphs (and other characters) would never say
« Reply #2014 on: June 14, 2013, 11:25:07 AM »

     In the Yeerk Pool, three Yeerks--Illium, Billium, William--about to "get it on."

     Illium: Oh, boy. My first threesome. This is gonna be sweet!

     Billium: So, we gonna get this party started?

     William: This will be a night none of us will ever forget.

     Some time later: the Yeerks are floating around in silence.

     Illium: I...I swear, that has never happened to me before.

     Billium: it's ok.

     Illium: I mean...You guys are just so attractive...

     Billium: It's fine. It happens to plenty of Yeerks.

     Illium: Not to me! I'm only in my twenty-fifth cycle!

     William: Hey, cheer up! In a few minutes we can try again.

     Some time later they try again. The Yeerks die.
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Re: Things the Animorphs (and other characters) would never say
« Reply #2015 on: June 14, 2013, 11:54:59 AM »
Police Box is totally a phone booth.

They're more like mobile police stations. The phone was in a compartment on the outside of the box that anyone could use, unlike phone booths where the phone is located inside the box.

Eh, it's a booth with a phone. I think our disagreement is in the terminology only :P

Aaaanyway, back on topic:

Ax: <Run everyone! I will take on the Visser on my own!>

Cassie: <Deal!>

Jake: <No, Ax! We're in this together! Until the end!>

Cassie: <Aw, man!>

Ax: <If you don't run now it'll be too late! I can handle this!>

Marco: <Ax, we're not leaving you!>

*Visser 3 appears pulling a little red wagon containing something covered in a blanket*

Visser: <Mwahahahaaaa...>

Rachel: <This time, Visser, you face the combined fury of the Andalite Bandits! It's morphin' time!>

Visser: <Six of you? I hope there's enough to go around...>

Rachel: <Oh, there's enough to go around, big boy. Enough pain, that is!> *she slaps her bear chest with her bear paw* <Bring it!>

Visser: <Ax, I thought you said you'd be alone.>

Ax: *sighs* <They insisted that we're friends til the end.>

Marco: <Ax... what is going on?>

Ax: <Leave me alone! You never listen to me!>

Visser: <Now, now, Ax, don't be mean. I'd love to meet your friends. And I packed enough...> *whips the blanket off the wagon, revealing a stack of picnic baskets* <...sandwiches for everyone!>

Jake: <I dunno... do I smell peanut butter? I'm allergic to peanut butter. This feels like a trap.>

Tobias (adult version, voice only, narrating): So there we were, trapped in an impossible situation. On one side, an awkward picnic with the Visser. On the other, an awkward refusal. A million thoughts ran through my head that day. How long had Ax and the Visser had a thing going behind our backs? Would it be possible to get cable at a nest in the woods? Should we picnic or should we not? As usual, it was Rachel who made the decision.

Rachel: <Let's do it!>
« Last Edit: June 14, 2013, 11:57:23 AM by Aluminator »

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Offline Falco tinnunculus

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Re: Things the Animorphs (and other characters) would never say
« Reply #2016 on: June 18, 2013, 11:12:33 AM »
Ax:I BREAK UP RELATIONS WITH YOU TOBIAS!YOU ARE JUST A BLOODTHIRSTY PREDATOR!!!
Tobias(Whisper):<Some people know what's wrong with him?>
Cassie:Well,he stepped on a mouse this morning,that's all.

Offline Blazing Angel

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Re: Things the Animorphs (and other characters) would never say
« Reply #2017 on: June 18, 2013, 12:11:50 PM »
The animorphs are gathered for a meeting in Cassie's barn.

Jake: and Ax thinks he may have an effective method for assassinating Visser 3.
Ax: I have been studying the Harry Potter series and I believe they contain our solution.
Cassie: Love?
Ax: No, guns. We're trying the really awesome, magical, 'look what I can do' approach, when a 9 millimeter is far more effective.
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Re: Things the Animorphs (and other characters) would never say
« Reply #2018 on: August 16, 2013, 08:44:36 PM »
Jara Hamee- "E equals MC Squared."

toby could say that (toby is the only hork-bajir who would understand that)  :horkf:

SmartGirl333

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Re: Things the Animorphs (and other characters) would never say
« Reply #2019 on: August 16, 2013, 09:15:04 PM »
Someone was bound to do this, at some point, so I might as well be the one to jump on the cliche.
---
Elfangor, looking a bit robotic: *scuba breathing*
Tobias: ???
Elfangor: Tobias, I am your fa-ther. *slices off Tobias' left wing*
Tobias, spiraling downward: <NOOOOoooooo....>
---
Aximili: <But...one does not simply WALK into the Yeerk Pool!>
---
The Sharing Members, all wearing hats with eye stalks on them: Who's the leader of the club that's made for you and me? V-I-S...S-E-R...T-H-R-E-E!
---
Vissers One and Three:
Islands in the stream, that is what we are! No one in between, how can we be wrong? Sail away with me to another dream....

(Tyler, at least, should find the last one hilarious, I think.)

is... that... star... wars... quotes?...

SmartGirl333

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Re: Things the Animorphs (and other characters) would never say
« Reply #2020 on: August 16, 2013, 09:20:47 PM »
Mongoose,
is the secound to last possibly from terminator?
I'm know the last one is from Space Odysey. Ha ha, both are funny.

the first one is definetly from futurama i mean "meatbag"? a robot with attitude? Obviously bendr.

Offline MoppingBear

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Re: Things the Animorphs (and other characters) would never say
« Reply #2021 on: August 26, 2013, 03:33:58 PM »
Jake: "Hey, maybe throwing a super powerful alien computer 10 feet into the ocean isn't a great idea, I mean, what if some kids playing on the beach find it?"

Viser 1: "Hmmm maybe I should focus on the fate of millions of my people instead of my petty vendeta against someone I was already promoted above.  Plus, if I'm the one to tell the council that Viser 3 is being foiled by a bunch of human children, I'll probably be rewarded and he'll be punished."

Any of the Animorph's parents: "Hmmm I notice you've been going out a lot and your grades are really starting to suffer.  You're grounded!"

redtailedsaffa

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Re: Things the Animorphs (and other characters) would never say
« Reply #2022 on: August 26, 2013, 03:40:34 PM »
I wonder why they never got grounded for going out so much? I mean, I certainly would have :P

Offline TobiasMasonPark

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Re: Things the Animorphs (and other characters) would never say
« Reply #2023 on: August 26, 2013, 04:23:41 PM »

     Actually, I think they were grounded a few times.
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Offline Salad Shooter

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Re: Things the Animorphs (and other characters) would never say
« Reply #2024 on: September 10, 2013, 05:30:07 PM »
They were grounded SEVERAL times.

The most notable being Jake in Megamorphs 1.

Although as they got older their parents probably didn't worry as much about them being out late.