Things the Animorphs (and other characters) would never say

[Darth Revan]

Okay, I won't post it then.

Out of context, it's kinda disturbing. In context, it's hilarious.

[~]

I need to know this quote Parker.

Also:

David- "I love you Tobias!"

[Galladerotom]

Cooking with the animorphs

Marco: today we are going to make a chiken pot pie. I am already a step ahead and made the dough. Which jake is currently cuting up as delecatly as possible.
(Jake in tiger morph moving claws very slowly across dough).
bokbokBOK!
Bang!
Marco: that will be Cassie with the chiken. Meanwhile take carrots, brocoili, and maybe celery and cut them up into as tiny pieces as possible,use a food processor, or invite your awsome alien friend over to do all the work.
Ax: (using his awsome tail to shred the veggies) < I am so eager to taste this chiken pot pie. I know it has chiken but am I correct in saying that it has..>
Marco: no Ax it does not.
Cassie: I have got it.
Marco: strange looking chiken Cassie.
Cassie: um Its tobias
Marco: that will do.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Ax: mmm... Do-nuts. (drools)
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Tobias: Rachel I'm in the mood for fish.
Rachel: Rabbit.
Tobias: Rabbit fish?
Rachel: Well its got fins
Tobias: Is it dead?
Rachel: Well it was coughing up blood last night
*one dead Rabbit fish later*
Tobias: appaling,what's for dessert
Rachel: Well, there's rat pudding, rat sorbet and strawberry tart
Tobias: strawberry tart?
Rachel: well its got some rat in it
Tobias: how much?
Rachel: Three rather alot really

[estrid]

haha good one gal, but i thought cassie killed tobias?

[Darth Revan]

I think the line break means that the quote is over.

you should modify your post with a line of hyphens to separate the three quotes, Gallad.

[Nero's Fury]

That one was funny


Rachel: TOBIAS! Quit humpin that duck and come here!


Rachel: Jake...secretly i love you...*They kiss*
Ax:<Bow chika bow bow>

[Alic]

That one was funny


Rachel: TOBIAS! Quit humpin that duck and come here!


Rachel: Jake...secretly i love you...*They kiss*
Ax:<Bow chika bow bow>

the incest thing.. gross.

[estrid]

ok tobias and the duck thing, can be ok. but rachel and jake? no way. dude they are FIRST COUSINS. that is major incest and a big nono. just ew no

[SuperBlue]

*two yeerks come together and split into tiny little yeerk offspring(that is how they're born right) *

Newborn Yeerk: Uh....did we all just get laid?

Visser 3: Sub Visser 8!
SV8: Yes sir?
V3: Can I confide in you?
SV8: Yes sir.
V3: I see dead people
SV8: Sir?
V3: I see dead people, all the time. They don't know they're dead.
SV8: Are you seeing one now?
V3: Yes *Visser 3 swipes his tail blade and decapitates the Sub Visser*

This deserves the "Epic Win of the Year" award

[Dameg]

*two yeerks come together and split into tiny little yeerk offspring(that is how they're born right) *

Newborn Yeerk: Uh....did we all just get laid?

Sorry but it's "3 Yeerks come together..."
We needa be 3 to make children.

Galladerotom, very funny ^^

[Ash]

Cooking with the animorphs

Marco: today we are going to make a chiken pot pie. I am already a step ahead and made the dough. Which jake is currently cuting up as delecatly as possible.
(Jake in tiger morph moving claws very slowly across dough).
bokbokBOK!
Bang!
Marco: that will be Cassie with the chiken. Meanwhile take carrots, brocoili, and maybe celery and cut them up into as tiny pieces as possible,use a food processor, or invite your awsome alien friend over to do all the work.
Ax: (using his awsome tail to shred the veggies) < I am so eager to taste this chiken pot pie. I know it has chiken but am I correct in saying that it has..>
Marco: no Ax it does not.
Cassie: I have got it.
Marco: strange looking chiken Cassie.
Cassie: um Its tobias
Marco: that will do.

Ax: mmm... Do-nuts. (drools)

Tobias: Rachel I'm in the mood for fish.
Rachel: Rabbit.
Tobias: Rabbit fish?
Rachel: Well its got fins
Tobias: Is it dead?
Rachel: Well it was coughing up blood last night
*one dead Rabbit fish later*
Tobias: appaling,what's for dessert
Rachel: Well, there's rat pudding, rat sorbet and strawberry tart
Tobias: strawberry tart?
Rachel: well its got some rat in it
Tobias: how much?
Rachel: Three rather alot really

That was flippin' hilarious! 

[Chad32]

First cousins wouldn't be major incest. Siblibngs would. Cousins are at least separated more, so there's less squick. Though I don't really like incest anyway.

But this is stuff they would never do, so yeah.

[Darth Revan]

*two yeerks come together and split into tiny little yeerk offspring(that is how they're born right) *

Newborn Yeerk: Uh....did we all just get laid?

Visser 3: Sub Visser 8!
SV8: Yes sir?
V3: Can I confide in you?
SV8: Yes sir.
V3: I see dead people
SV8: Sir?
V3: I see dead people, all the time. They don't know they're dead.
SV8: Are you seeing one now?
V3: Yes *Visser 3 swipes his tail blade and decapitates the Sub Visser*

This deserves the "Epic Win of the Year" award

Nice one , Blue; and thank you.

[estrid]

First cousins wouldn't be major incest. Siblibngs would. Cousins are at least separated more, so there's less squick. Though I don't really like incest anyway.

But this is stuff they would never do, so yeah.

first cousin incest is like 90% as bad as sibling incest. especially looking at it from a biological stand point

[Darth Revan]

How 'bout we stop talking about incest? Seriously.

We can all agree it's detestable. Let's move on!


CRACK!
Tobias: Jake, a little to the left
Jake: Okay
CRACK!
Tobias: Almost, just a scoatch to the right.
Jake: Gotcha
CRACK!
Tobias: SO close.
Jake: Tobias, I gotta ask you, why isn't this hawk flying away?
Tobias: He's deaf, but he's real mean when he sees you. Just kill 'im will you?