Aetheas nods absently as Ossanlin speaks, trying to remember what he'd read in Ferxal's personnel file. He'd only skimmed it briefly; there have been so many personnel files he's read in the last week, they all seem to be running together in his memory. Besides which, they're hardly the most interesting part of his training. The Captain seems to have gleaned more from Ferxal's file than he has.
Keeping his main eyes on Ossanlin, he orders his ARC to display the file in the air to his right side, and he skims it with his stalk eyes as the Captain speaks. He doesn't really manage to take any of it in, however. He's distracted by Ossanlin's words; words which spark thoughts going in a thousand different directions.
There's the reaction to what Ossanlin is actually saying. Leadership is a balancing act, a precarious line, a constant pull between taking risks and playing it safe, and he is certain he doesn't yet know where that line is. Leaders will fail, same as anyone else, but when he fails, the consequences can be disastrous. Even fatal. Aetheas finds himself nodding. <I hope I am ready when the time comes,> he says earnestly, though it is clear from his tone that he does not yet see command in his immediate future.
The rest of what runs through his mind is... more complicated. He finds himself staring at the Captain, trying to imagine a time when War-Prince Ossanlin can have failed... unsure whether he's simply imagined the hint of pain in the Captain's voice. He resolves to start spending more time with the personnel files-- all the personnel files, including Ossanlin's. Again, he finds himself in awe of Ossanlin, for more reasons than one. Nobody has ever taken Aetheas under their guidance before. Very seldom has anyone seemed to think he could amount to being anything more than a vecol, and for that reason, the only expectations he's ever really had to live up to have been his own. For the first time in as long as he can remember, he finds himself afraid that he won't be able to live up to the Captain's expectations-- to what this ship and its crew needs.
<I have been watching you,> he says to the War-Prince, <and the other commanders aboard. I believe I am beginning to understand what is required to command.> The seldom-seen hint of a smile crosses his eyes as he shuts off his ARC again. <Experience. I am attempting to see where the lines and appropriate restrictions are. I have never had to watch for the well-being of a crew before, aside from completing my duties.> He hesitates, and without explaining his thoughts, says, sincerely, <Thank you, Captain.>
Varit laughs and responds almost automatically, "Oddly, no. Not directly, anyway. That was mostly bad luck and poor decisions on my part." He takes a deep breath, sighing at the aroma of the nutrient-rich Yeerk pool. It's not exactly the Hilton, but it'll do. "Host sympathy is considered a weakness in the empire. I was unlucky enough to be found out. I was lucky enough to escape alive. I suppose having an... unusual Taxxon host helped to keep me sympathetic. Having friends in the Peace Movement didn't hurt either."
He finds himself eying Keshin warily. "A contract killer." He looks around-- something he can do without having to turn his head or body-- and then leans closer. "It seems like that would give you a very... unique skill-set. Potentially a very useful one." His voice is wavering, and it's clear to anyone who can read Taxxon responses that he's not entirely comfortable having this conversation. "But then... it would also make you very, very difficult to trust." He pauses, "I think I'm beginning to understand the way Keslin was looking at you."
"So," he says lightly, changing tones quickly, "where can I hang up my host so that I can feed?"
<<Me next!>> says Resseliss excitedly.