Memoirs of a RAFian

[Cloak]

Yep, and let's start this book!
 

BOOK L:
MAUL
CHAPTER ONE:
zzzzzzZZZZZZZzzzzzz

"Cloak met him in a swamp down in RAFDagoba
Where it bubbles all the time like a giant carbonated soda.
S-O-D-A, soda.
He saw the telepathic guy sitting there on a log.
He asked him his name and in a raspy voice he said, "Yarin."
Y-A-R-I-N, Yarin.
Ya-ya-ya-ya Yarin.
Well, I've been around, but I've never seen, I say,
A guy who looks like a Fourarms but he's thin and gray!
Ya-ya-ya-ya Yarin, Ya-ya-ya-ya Yarin!
Well, I'm not dumb, but I can't understand
How he can lift me in the air just by raising his hand.
Oh my, Yarin!
Ya-ya-ya-ya Yarin, Ya-ya-ya-ya Yarin!
Well, I left home just a week before,
And I've never ever been a RAFian before.
But Chad, he set him straight, of course.
He said, "Go to Yarin and he'll show you the Forum."
Well, he's not the kind that would argue with him,
So, it looks like he's gonna start all over again
With Yarin.
Ya-ya-ya-ya Yarin, Ya-ya-ya-ya Yarin!
Yarin!
Ya-ya-ya-ya Yarin Ya-ya-ya-ya Yarin!
So, he used the Forum.
He picked up a box.
He lifted some rocks
While he stood on his head.
Well, he won't forget what Yarin said.
He said, "Cloak, stay away from the darker side
And if you start to go astray, let the Forum be your guide."
Oh, Yarin!
Ya-ya-ya-ya Yarin!
"I know Ken's really got you annoyed,
But remember, if you kill him, then you'll be unemployed."
Oh, Yarin.
Ya-ya-ya-ya Yarin!
Well, he heard his friends really got in a mess.
So, he's gonna have to leave Yarin, I guess.
But he knows that he'll be coming back some day.
He'll be playing this part 'till I'm old and gray!
With Yarin!
Ya-ya-ya-ya Yarin!
Ya-ya-ya-ya Yarin!"

At the end of this song was greeted with -- "zzzzzzzzzzzZZZZZZZZ ZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzz . . . ."

"HEY! I DIDN'T FALL ASLEEP DURING YOUR STORIES!!" she protested.

"Our stories didn't take three hours to finish," Gaz said, sipping her coffee.

[redtailedsaffa]

So Horse is doing a ballad, then.

[theyoungphoenix]

"Why," Cloak said, with a smirk, "allow me."

"Cloak, why do I get the feeling a puppy dies every time you smile like that?" Abby teased.

Haha. My best friend said that I would totally say something like that too!

How does it feel to be on book fifty, Cloaky??

[Shenmue654]

Hmmm . . . that may be useful for some chapters, but I haven't visited the Species thread in a while. What is the name of your species?

"Human, accompanied by a creepy disembodied spirit with an erudite thespian voice who has claimed he's everything from a fairy to Satan."

The gremlins belong to the spirit, in headcanon. He probably wishes they didn't.

[Underseen]

It took a little over a year, but you're finally at book 50! I'm impressed.

[redtailedsaffa]

As am I. And what a ride.

Abby, you sound like you're interviewing him.

[Cloak]

Hmmm . . . that may be useful for some chapters, but I haven't visited the Species thread in a while. What is the name of your species?

"Human, accompanied by a creepy disembodied spirit with an erudite thespian voice who has claimed he's everything from a fairy to Satan."

The gremlins belong to the spirit, in headcanon. He probably wishes they didn't.

Hmmm. . . . I'll bear that in mind.

How does it feel to be on book fifty, Cloaky??

You should see the looks of shock when I tell people.

So Horse is doing a ballad, then.

Not really, Saffa, she didn't sing the entire stories. Those two song adaptations were just bookending it.

CHAPTER TWO:
Caught

A few uneventful days later, Demos was in his lab, humming an adaption of "Making Friends" from "The Chipmunks Meet Frankenstein". The room was dark, the only light was sickly green and coming from some variously sized cryogenic tubes filled with some colloidal, toxic waste-colored goo. There was a lifeform in every single one, eerie silhouettes.

Well, one large one appeared to be broken, the goo having dried to the consistency of melted glass. One of the creations had obviously achieved self-awareness and escaped.

Demos was bustling about the lab. He was fawning over his "babies", his "pretties". He didn't even notice that he had already been made.

"They should all be destroyed," Cloak said. He observed the chaotic hostility that all of them seemed to exhibit in their somniferous fits.

"Cloak!" Demos said, clearly flustered. He dropped the two test tubes he was holding -- one with a blue liquid and a red liquid in the other. They corroded the floor at his feet. The demon was unaffected. "Uh, uh, wh-what are . . . you . . . doing . . . uh, here?"

"You mean in your secret lab?"

"It's not really a secret lab, it's just -- uh --"

"A monster-making facility?" Cloak supplied.

"Yes!" Demos said quickly before realizing what was said, and turning tact, " I mean no! No!"

"Demos," Cloak said, arms folded. "This is precisely why your lab rights were revoked. You know the mods -- as well as Esty and myself -- look disfavorably at monster-making."

"Cloak, I know it looks bad, but please don't --"

"Report you?" Cloak said. "Sorry, Demos. I cannot turn a blind eye to this."

"Cloak! Please! Please don't!"

Cloak turned his back to Demos, began to walk away. But then he stopped, and spoke to the demon, over his shoulder.

"I gave you the benefit of a doubt when you first crafted this lair," Cloak said. He had Earthsighted it immediately. "And this is what you endeavored to do with that."

He looked onward, before saying regretfully. "I'm sorry, Demos. But something must be done before your monsters wreck havoc."

"They won't!" he protested. "They are all in safe confines!"

Cloak whipped around, slightly offended. "You think me a fool?! I can easily see that broken canister over there! Where is that one, pray tell?"

Silence.

"I thought so."

Then he was gone.

[redtailedsaffa]

Demos is the perfect anti-hero.

[Cloak]

He does, doesn't he? Yes, this'll be a Demos-heavy book -- as if you couldn't already tell.

CHAPTER THREE:
Condemn and Conundrum

"Demos, it has reached our attention that you have been genetically engineering monsters." Richard said.

A tribunal setting had been set up, with the mods behind an elevated table. Cloak and Estelore flanked opposite sides, standing. Estelore held her hands in front of her in a very ladylike fashion, giving off a faint yellow glow in the dim room. Cloak had his arms folded, head bowed slightly, disappointed that Demos forced him to take this action. Unlike Estelore, the darkness caused his cloak to blend in, so he was very nearly invisible.

"My babies are not monsters," Demos protested unconvincingly. "They, uh, wouldn't harm a fly!"

The mods produced a jar with the most minute one ravenously and viciously disemboweling a housefly.

<You were saying?> Esplin replied dryly.

"But . . . but . . . that the only one I, uh," Demos spluttered, clearly looking for a way to weasel out of this. He was not succeeding.

"Demos," Cloak said, flatly. His voice rang out causing the demon to flinch.

"I -- I swear!"

Cloak's eyes narrowed and his gaze grew icy. "Demos, knock it off."

"I -- I'm afraid I don't --"

"Demos, I know that you made over 150 monstrosities!" Cloak snarled. "None of which showed any redeemable qualities."

"Given that," Phoenix said, effectively defusing the situation, "the question remains of what to do with ones that are still caged."

"They are all safely caged and accounted for," Demos said, dropping the pretense.

"Except for the one," Cloak said, shrewdly.

"Except the -- I mean, nothing!" Demos said, clearly still trying to cover things up.

<The conundrum still persists,> Esplin said. <How to confine these monstrocities securely.>

"Don't I get a say in this?" Demos said hostilely.

"No."

It was Richard who spoke.

"No, you're too close to this, Demos. We cannot trust you not to impede or interfere with this."

[redtailedsaffa]

That thing must have extreme dexterity if it could disembowel a fly.

[Cloak]

Or of similar size, if not a tad bigger.

And, sorry, but I'm not feeling it right now, so no chapter today. But, I can bring you these:

• BOOK CCXIV: "Since Time Immovable" --Time stops and only a few RAFians are unaffected.
• BOOK CCXV: "The Abusement Park" -- The RAFians are trapped at an amusement park.

Please tell me if any of these seem like a rehash of older books by the simple synopsis-es. It's getting hard for me to remember . . .

[redtailedsaffa]

No, I went over the list earlier and it doesn't seem that way. The first Bibliophaetos one did start in an amusement park, but that was only part of the story.

[Cloak]

Ah, thanks, Saffa. Hmmm . . . "Saffa the Archiver" . . . too much?

Anyway, I'll post another chapter as soon as I get my notebook. . . . And here we go.

CHAPTER FOUR:
Remaking Fiends

"Demos," Richard said, as the inquisition party adjourned to his secret lab. "These tubes are empty."

"I disposed of them," Demos said flatly.

"He lies," Cloak said, dully, at once.

"Damn Earthsight."

"Language." SuperNate prompted.

"I'm a demon," Demos shrugged. "Cursing is in my nature."

<And the Armani suits?> Esplin said, his hooves clopping echoing in an ominous, eerie way.

"They're silk," Demos said stiffly. "They're a weakness of mine."

"Don't change the subject," Estelore said, parentally. "Where are the creatures?"

"I took care of it already." Demos said.

"You're talking in circles," Cloak said, sensing truth in the demon's vague words.

"Time to be more explicit, Demos." Richard said, heavily. "Or this could be considered grounds for Banning."

"Okay, okay." Demos said, raising his hands in mock surrender. "They're here. I dehydrated and encapsulated them in these balls."

He revealed something out of the pilot of the "Lilo & Stitch". The balls were arranged in stasis in the shape of a double helix.

Cloak's eyes narrowed, "There better be six hundred twenty-five monstrosities in there."

"Huh?" Demos said.

"Never mind."

"Demos, remand the balls capsule to mod custody." Richard said, sounding worn.

"Okay, okay!" Demos said, hands up. He handed over the capsule.

Cloak narrowed his eyes suspiciously. Demos gave into that too easy, with virtually no resistance. He was either more coldhearted or heartless then Cloak knew . . . or he had a contingency plan.

[redtailedsaffa]

LOL it does seem that way, eh? I'll put up a PDF of the list sometime when I get my Wi-Fi back.

[Cloak]

Now if anyone asks if I back up my "Memoirs", I can say I have a person for that. . . . Too conceited?

Anyway. The second chapter, as I didn't post one yesterday.

CHAPTER FIVE:
Mysterious Thief

Cloak's suspicions were right. Demos had returned to the holding place for the capsules. He had gone with standard cat burglary ensemble, though looking rather odd on a demon.

"Don't worry, my babies," he murmured, "I'll have you back."

"Will you, now?" came a voice. Cloak came into view as the moon peeked out from a cloud, removing the shroud of darkness. He was leaning nonchalantly against a wall with his arms folded, an unsurprised look on his face.

"Cloak! You've gotta stop doing that!" Demos said, clutching his chest. "You're gonna give me a heart attack."

"Wouldn't have," Cloak said, standing upright, walking to Demos. His cloak swished rather like a guillotine. "Wouldn't have, if you weren't being dupliciteous, deceitful, and deceiving."

"Cute." Demos said, matching Cloak's demeanor. "What gave me away?"

"You gave in too easy." Cloak said. "Cloak, I have to have them back. They're my babies."

"They're monsters, Demos." Cloak said, emphatically. "Bestial, nonsentient monstrosities who possess no loyalty, no respectability, no affection."

"They're innocent!"

"They're many things, Demos, but 'innocent' isn't one of them."

"They've never hurt anyone," Demos said. "They never had the chance."

"Disregarding how bad the last bit, it doesn't matter, anyway."

"Says who? You?" the demon replied.

"I forgot. You rely solely on your eyes to see." Cloak said evenly.

"Huh? What are you talking about?"

"Go on, then. See for yourself."

Demos did, and Cloak allowed it.

"It's gone!!"

"That's right." Cloak said. "Someone -- or something -- beat us both here."

"Why didn't you do anything?!"

"It was gone before I got here. I had assumed that you took it, had you not shown up twenty minutes later."