My name is Jake. Thats all I can tell you. Know why? Because im constipated and I'm trying real hard to poop. Maybe I'll tell you some stuff later. Oh crap....CRAP!!!! DONT JUST SIT THERE!!! My butt ripped open!!!!!! HELP!!
Hey, the poop is out....AAAAH what do I do??!!! I guess I'll go to the emergency room....
That was 2 days ago. My butt is fine, since I morphed into a turd and when I morphed back into human my butt was healed. Best of all its bigger and squishy, like a water balloon. I advise all of you people to rip your butts open from constipation. Its a great gimmick. Rachel noticed it, too. All of us Animorphs were meeting in the barn, Cassie had just finished her job as a stripp....her job at the library. Rachel was touching Tobias's feathers (again, that h0re) and i was chewing on a piece of hay. Ax was blabbing on and on about how if we didnt destroy soem yeerk thingy or whatever earth would be in doom for real. I didn't care though. Why would I?
BOOM
Next thing you know we were surrounded by Hork-Bajir Controllers and Visser 3! They pointed there guns at us.
"What do you want from us?" Yelled Cassie as she was thrown into the blade ship. Visser 3 smirked. We were piled up, with ME on the bottom! Suddenly i noticed an opening. It was in a small dark corner, a little hole. I told everyone the plan and morphed into a rat. Next thing ya know I clicked a shiny button and the animorphs were out of the room thing!
" BATTLE MORPHS!" I yelled at the top of my lungs as I emerged from a rat to human. " I'm hit!" Yelled Marco. I turned back, and sure enough he was covered in poop from the poop guns the hork-bajir were holding. Scared out of my wits, I ran for it. The blade ship was still on the ground, and it was currently under lockdown. I ran at the top of my speed, plowing over taxxons and what not. Once i finally reached the main exit, everyone was firing at me. Then I saw him.
TOM.
I slashed a paw at his face. He went down. <Thats for drinking the last of the Kool-Aid, loser.> I said to him as he saw the light. I dashed out the exit.
42 years later.....
That was long ago. I have never seen the other Animorphs since it happened. Right now I live in the swamps of Madagascar. Yeerks are everywhere. I relocate at least twice a year because of them. I mean, I still have my morphing powers, right? Yup. Things are pretty good. If I'm lucky tonight's dinner is rock soup. Ya know what? I think I gotta poop.....
*rippp*
aww crap...........
THE END
