The secret life of the American superhero

[Blazing Angel]

Just throwing this out there. I've had a few characters and ideas bouncing around in my head. Why knows, maybe I can have the first original character fan fiction turned into a comic book. Is it fan fiction if it's an original character?
___________________ ___________________ ___________________ __________


 Being a teenager sucks. Anybody who says otherwise is a filthy liar. What really makes it bad is simply how every experience is a totally original kind of awful. Some people finally realize just how unnatractive they are. Others fall into the yawning pit that is social awkwardness. Others hit puberty with a bus and are suddenly a foot taller and two octives deeper over a two month span. Others, like me, get super powers. My name is Ryan Shang. I'm a freak. I'm a geek. And I have god damn superpowers.

[redtailedsaffa]

Nice opening. And your question confused me now

[Underseen]

I guess you can say its fan fiction. It starts good.

[theyoungphoenix]

Nice intro... and yes.... It is still considered fanfiction if you base it on a story that's already been written. Trust me, I've seen plenty like that... But, still, good intro...

[Blazing Angel]

I'll have something out later today. For the past two fays I've been booked schedule wise.

[Blazing Angel]

My name is Ryan Shang. I am a seventeen year senior at Great Oak High School, in Aberdeen Washington. It's a mid sized town, with a population of sixteen thousand according to the census. The biggest claim to faim is that two members of the 90's grunge band Nirvana were born here. Coming in at a very close second is being the hometown of WWE wrestler Daniel Bryan. It wouldn't be so bad if the biggest high school in town hadn't decided to model the school mascot after Mr Bryan. I find pep rallies have the opposite of the intended affect when you try to force people to get excited without giving them any particular reason to. And having a giant disproportionate man with a neck beard and skin tight shorts attending somehow turns a depressing event into a tragic comedy of sorts.

[spoiler][/spoiler]

I'm probably setting a bad first impression. Honestly most of the time I have a very cherub-like demeanor. As of late though, the whole puberty thing is finally catching up. I want from short and fat to a skinny lamp post in a manner of two months and gained the ability to read minds practicaly over night. Hmm? You're more curious about the mind reading? Fine. It started when I was about 15. When I got pissed off, at my parents, at my friends, at my **** neighbors dog, one thing or another just...flew right at them. It was strange, but I didn't put much thought into it until my dad threw out his back when a garden gnome smashed into him.

After that happened I got freaked out. After all, I don't want, nor will I ever want to hurt anyone. I'm a pacifist by design. Eventually general panic led to paranoia. Then after that, straight depression. And, apparently I was lot atupider when I was 15, because I decided to actually try my hand at being a superhero. It went as well as you would expect, meaning that I had one really crappy night of riding around the business district on a ten speed bike looking for crime. The affair ended on a high note when I actually FOUND some crime, and ran the hell away because what am I supposed to do? I'm a teenager who can read peoples minds and mess up your furniture by thinking at it really hard. I'm trying to put the whole thing behind me at this point. Live and learn I guess.

[Underseen]

Reminds me of the comic book series Invincible.

[Blazing Angel]

In my experience God, the Universe, fate, whatever  you choose to believe in, has a very grim determination to drive you towards what it wants now matter how much you may protest along the way. People born strong become athletes. People who like Star Trek start software companies. And people with super powers become heroes.

Super powers wouldn't be called a rare thing in this day and age, even though they've estimated the odds of having them are literally one in a million. I don't even think I'm the only guy with powers in town, an 8th grader named Bryce Lynn has been near enough fires to rule out coincidence. Nothing I can say for certain, but I am dead sure I'm superhuman. I've been doing a lot of thinking like this lately. Deep thinking. Questioning why, and how. Maybe the deep thinking is what motivated me to take up crime fighting again. Maybe it's why I'm currently being shot at.

BANG! BANG!

I'm sure you've heard this a million times before, but gunshots aren't quiet. The sound of gun powder exploding hard enough to send a piece of metal faster than the speed of sound is beyond belief. And it's currently filling my ears.

Actively trying to be a hero seems to be what's screwing me up. If I had been walking by, and through sheer coincidence saw this convenience store being robbed, everything would have gone a lot more smoothly. But alas, I'm currently crouching for cover behind a chip rack.  I think too much in high stakes situations.

BANG!

"Get out of there kid! Or I'll s-" The mans threats were cut off quite suddenly. Choked on his own spit hopefuly? But no, it appears the five foot seven middle eastern cashier is more competent than me, as she currently has this dangerous armed criminal in a headlock. All I could do was sigh, and mentally pull the gun out of his hand.

[Underseen]

Telekinesis is such a cool power.

[redtailedsaffa]

Telekinesis. You can either be a hero with it or the world's greatest petty thief. Take your pick.

[theyoungphoenix]

Yep. Haha.

[Blazing Angel]

As I made my exit, I briefly considered leaping through the store's display window. I ruled this out when I remembered how much it cost to replay a window. So I ran out the automatic doors in the most heroic fashion a teenager in baggy jeans and a superman sweat shirt can manage. My bike flew to me and I booked it out of there. The stores alarm began behind me and I heard sirens in  the distance as I rode out. That could have gone better. Every freaking time I try to do some good for the world, the world politely says no with a good old fashioned reality check. It's frustrating beyond belief. Probably awful for my own self esteem to, as I was considering the pros and cons of becoming a telekinetic hermit. Nah I pondered I couldn't live without the freedom to visit a taco truck at will.

What exactly spiked this sudden need to go Batmaning? Well I got a copy of Watchmen. Watchmen, the revolutionary graphic novel, so revolutionary and influential that it currently sits at #90 of Time magazines top 100 novels since 1923. Considered to be the most mature and complex story ever written in a graphic novel, the story of a group of heroes trying to deal with the corruption that limits both them and society as a whole. Pretty inspiring s*** it what I'm saying. Even thinking about was bringing my mood up. A better mood led to clearer thinking, as I cruised past the playground, I began to think of how I might actually improve. Super powers do not make a superhero. I was built like a stick man, couldn't fight my way out of a wet paper bag, and had all the courage and motivation of an obese squirrel. So at best I could be an intern for the Justice League. I needed to improve my body and my mental state. So I texted my parents to give myself enough time for a ten mile bike ride. Then stopped at mile 3 for a breather and a bottle of snapple. I was seriously pathetic. So I made my way home, ordered a workout DVD, threw all the cheese puffs we had in the garbage, and got to work.

[redtailedsaffa]

You have a seriously humorous (or is it humorously serious?) style of writing.

[Blazing Angel]

I attempt to simultaneously emulate Douglas Adams (Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy) and Yatzee Croshaw (Web series Zero Punctuation, books: Mogworld)

Both have an element I refer to as a British wit. Subtle humor, good quips, fast metaphors. Telling a sensible yet hilarious story.

“The ships hung in the sky in much the same way that bricks don't.” Douglas Adams

"I don't think America is populated entirely by ****s and cowboys; I know that some Canadians live there, too." Yatzee Croshaw.

[theyoungphoenix]

That's funny stuff right there.