First . . . the list.
- Book XXIV: The First Master
Cloak meditates alone in a forest, and has a vision about the first Master . . . the first Elements Master.
- Book XXV: RAF -- The Musical
The RAFians find themselves trapped in a musical where everyone must burst into song occasionally.
- Book XXVI: Outage Outrage
The RAFians find themselves losing their powers.
- Book XXVII: Infinity and Eternity
The Infinity Gems and the Eternity Stones make themselves known.
- Book XXVIII: The Virus Rings
The RAFians are attacked by foes they never thought they'd see again.
The RAFians are attacked by Dementors, which have a rather large effect on Cloak.
- Book XXX: Mayhem of the Music Miser
Cloak recalls the RAFians' previous confrontation with the Music Miser three years ago.
- Book XXXI: The Metal-Maker
The RAFians must save their own from a Roboticizer.
- Book XXXII: Richard is Missing
The RAFians must cope without Richard.
- Book XXXIII: Emotional Food
The RAFians must confront a different kind of vampire.
- Book XXXIV: Transformation Confrontation
The RAFians must confront some strange machines.
- Book XXXV: Richard's Horn
The RAFians must get Richard's Horn, a mystical musical instrument, back from Malice, who received it from a RAFian traitor.
A Wildwethel-centric book, he must deal with his feral side.
- Book XXXVII: Predators and Prey
The RAFians are being preyed upon by some sentient predators.
- Book XXXVIII: A Protean Problem
The RAFians must deal with a powerful snot-nosed kid who, quite literally, can do whatever he wants.
Four RAFians are captured and converted into four Horsemen of the ancient, rogue Realm Walker Cataclysm.
- Book XL: Sizeable Pain in the Necks
The RAFians must deal with Heinlein aliens.
- Book XLI: RAF's Nightmare
The RAFians must survive their own nightmares.
- Book XLII: Unlucky Charms
The RAFians must contend with a rather bloodthirsty leprechaun.
The RAFians must contend with a pied piper.
- Book XLIV: Starlight Desire
The RAFians race Malice, Abomination, and the Banned to a wishing star (no, not Estelore).
Parker is outraged to see knockoffs of his rather unique armor and what they're being used for.
- Book XLVI: The Worst Plague
The RAFians must weather the worst plague to ever existed -- the Hate Plague.
- Book XLVII: Little Alien Napoleons
The RAFians are caught in the middle of a war between Helmacrons and Fmeks.
The RAFians must deal with the paparazzi who are all of a sudden interested in them.
RAFians tell various RAFian-themed stories across a lunch table.
The RAFians must deal with the result of one of Demos's experiments.
The RAFians must face their greatest desires.
Read the "Mummies Alive" parody in the RAFize songs thread.
- Book LIII: The Pain Reliever
The RAFians must deal with an elderly Vulcan styling himself the "Pain Reliever".
- Book LIV: Beyond the Veils
Aquilai and Aila must confront old foes while the other RAFians must put up with a Czarinian bounty hunter.
Demos meets up with his half-brother, Shenecron, who has a perchant for making deals.
Malice seeks out the Unimind.
- Book LVII: The End of Time
The RAFians must contend with two Kryptonians (who think they're Time Lords) and prevent them from ending time altogether.
The RAFians must capture a Plasmavore and put up with it's rather stupid Judoon jailer.
Estelore, Richard, Parker, and Cloak must survive when the entire city and forum have been reduced to two-year-olds.
- Book LX: The Replacements
The RAFians must contend with the fame-feeding Eidolon Consciousness.
The RAFians must contend with the Arachnoids and finding a cure for one of their own that was poisoned before it's too late.
- Book LXII: Personal Tissues
The RAFians must contend with some one misusing Bibliophaetos's discarded book shell.
- Book LXIII: Memory Today, Gone Tomorrow
The RAFians lose their memory and must find a way to regain it.
- Book LXIV: Appliance Armageddon
A superintelligent computer controls all electronics, and the RAFians must stop it.
- Book LXV: Prodigy and Composite
Some RAFians are merged into two separate entities.
The Universes begin colliding and merging.
The RAFians are confronted by a Super Chucky.
- Book LXVIII: They're Such Cards
The RAFians are sealed into cards, which end up trapped in an ancient leather-bound book, and it's up to three kids to free them. An out-of-continuity book.
- Book LXIX: Dinosaur Island
Everyone, except those that bear a Mark, begin turning saurian.
The RAFians must deal with the son of Cataclysm, Corruptor.
- Book LXXI: Artificial Skins
The RAFians must deal with symbiotes.
- Book LXXII: Separation Anxiety
The RAFians must contend with an ethereal virus.
- Book LXXIII: A Thing About RAFians
The RAFians must contend with Seekers, which home in onto their Marks.
- Book LXXIV: A Planted Idea
The RAFians must contend with a floramaniac.
- Book LXXV: Vacation Photos
The RAFians are sucked into a Polarisoid camera.
- Book LXXVI: A Personal Gremlin
The RAFians must contend with gremlins.
- Book LXXVII: The Rust is Silence
The Rafians must deal with an oxidation ray wielded by a criminal.
- Book LXXVIII: The Toyman Cometh
The RAFians deal with a Toyman-esque character.
Yes, just another excuse to put in more of the (as of writing) nearly 800 parodies.
Cloak battles an ancient being called Garrotik.
- Book LXXXI: Slave Islands and Juggernauts
Three RAFians are taken prisoners by the Knights and sold into the slavery of New Genoshia, while the others deal with a juggernaut.
- Book LXXXII: Shredding a King
The RAFians deal with a demonic Shredder-like ghost called Regiphaetos.
- Book LXXXIII: RAF -- The TV Show
The RAFians are forcibly recruited to Mojo's programs.
The RAFians must contend with a Spirit-Drinker.
- Book LXXXV: The Last Laugh
The RAFians must face Joker Gas.
- Book LXXXVI: It's A Mad, Mad, Mad Villain
The RAFians must contend with mind control cards which are ineffective on them.
- Book LXXXVII: Sight Unseen
Six RAFians are rendered functionally blind, optically-speaking.
- Book LXXXVIII: Don't Let It Snow
The RAFians must face a second Ice Age caused by a Diznee Ice Ifrit.
- Book LXXXIX: The Rachel Toxin
The RAFians must find a cure to a toxin that increases the fearlessness, hostility and aggressiveness induced in people which the Mark cannot protect the RAFians from.
The RAFians face a dangerous virus seeking a host.
- Book XCI: A Youthful Thief
The RAFians face a creature that siphons off the youth in its victims, provided they're younger than him.
- Book XCII: Calendar Creep
The RAFians face the Calendar Creep, a criminal whose crimes are holiday themed.
Faerie fights a witch-boy named Salem (and his magical black cat, Saberhagen) for a magical branding iron in Faerie's possession.
Nothing like a "Subspace Emissary" parody. Sorry.
The RAFians' world is turned into yarn and fabric.
- Book XCVI: RAFian Gladiators
RAFians are kidnapped by Gamesmaster, another rogue Realm Walker, and force to participate in gladiatorial games.
The RAFians must cage thirteen Revenants released from Pandora's Box -- each representing and amplifying a particular feeling (i.e. hatred), while looking for the perfect host.
- Book XCVIII: From the Shadows
The RAFians must save their shadows and the shadows of everyone else from being absorbed (eaten) by the Umbraraptors, but not everything is what it seems.
- Book XCIX: Grimm Prospects
The RAFians discover Malice controlling several "wesen" with control collars akin to April's in
"Catwoman from Channel Six" and get stuck in one-on-one battles to the death with them. One will die.
Everyone's trapped in a temporal loop, but the only ones that realize it are Cloak, Aila, and Aquilai.
The RAFians face a creature native to the planet Gossamer, who's under the control of Malice.
The RAFians must exterminate an epidemic of
Thread.
The RAFians must deal with a siren and her alluring song.
- Book CIV: Resistance is Futile
The RAFians must deal with a hybridization of the Borg and the Hive chips (
Ben 10: Alien Swarm) -- which the Mark cannot protect them from, nor the Unity energy can destroy.
The RAFians must contend with the Titan serum and its effects.
The RAFians must deal with a hungry Stone-Biter and a petrifying venom of a Diznee Stone Ifrit.
- Book CVII: Spritely Pests
The RAFians must deal with irritating sprites, which Faerie has had some rather tenuous experiences with.
- Book CVIII: Destroy All . . . What?
The RAFians must contend with a Furon incursion, and it turns out the Nyacs have knowledge of Furons. . . .
- Book CIX: Going Backwards
A grievious malfunction in Aquilai's TARDIS causes time to reverse its flow and flow backwards.
- Book CX: Death Takes A Holiday
The RAFians must convince Death to take up his role again. A RAFian will die in this book, and it is within the continuity.
- Book CXI: High Price Stakes
Shanker and Gaz must flee and elude Daphne, the vampire hunter.
- Book CXII: A Killer Housing Market
The RAFians must survive and either destroy or escape a killer house.
- Book CXIII: A Silenced World
The RAFians must cope with a world that has become muted and a young sorceress, Melissa Spellman.
The RAFians must save their own from the insideous Bureau of Lost.
- Book CXV: To Tell the Truth
Broken's apprentice, Melissa, accidentally casts a spell forcing everyone to tell the truth.
The RAFians, repulsed and revolted, must contend with Hundred (who eventually becomes
Thousand, then becomes Million, then Billion, and then, finally, Trillion).
- Book CXVII: School of Stepford Lies
The RAFians must save the children from a school that turns them into Stepford students at Terenia's school.
The RAFians must deal with the Salt Man.
- Book CXIX: The Great Race
The RAFians hold a race that Aloth cons himself into. Who will win?
The RAFians must help super intelligent apes -- Caesar the chimp, Brutus the gorilla, and Maestro the orangutan -- reconcil their misanthropy.
- Book CXXI: A Different Kind of Unity
The RAFians must contend with a parasitic "unity".
- Book CXXII: The Great Brain Robery
Someone is stealing brains for an unknown purpose.
- Book CXXIII: The Bounty Hunter
The Knights, in their hypocricy, hire a Tsul'Kalu bounty hunter to collect select RAFians (to taxidermy).
- Book CXXIV: New Controllers
The RAFians confront Zirconians.
- Book CXXV: Creeping Crystal
A wave of crystallizing energy is sweeping the land. . . .
- Book CXXVI: The Element Feeder
The RAFians deal with a creature who feeds on a specific element and matures to a different element each time as it matures. . . .
- Book CXXVII: The Rider and the Walker
The RAFians come up against the Ghost Rider.
- Book CXXVIII: Headhunters
What will happen when RAFians lose their heads? Seriously.
- Book CXXIX: The Color Purple, Man!
The RAFians confront the
Purple Man, who manages to turn the entire government against them . . .
- Book CXXX: The Nemetrix Beetle
The RAFians confront the Black Beetle with Nemetrix properties.
- Book CXXXI: It's Tought to Be A Mod
The members of a primitive forum declare Demos and Blue to be mods. . . .
An energy reaction begins turning RAFians into monstrous creatures in 3013. Out-of-continuity book.
- Book CXXXIII:Well, Techadon-ally . . .
The RAFians confront Techadons who assign them qualitive quatilities, and refuse to acknowledge any defeats.
- Book CXXXIV:The Mind's Eye
The RAFians face Spellbinder and his realistic illusions.
- Book CXXXV:Bas-ic Instincts
Bas awakens and attempts to take control of Cloak and other felines.
Now, a new chapter -- short, sorrry . . . that will have no RAFians in it. (Might as well get used to it, the next book won't have any RAFians in it, except for a brief bit with me at the beginning and end.)
CHAPTER TWO:
The B.I.R.
Meanwhile, whilst the RAFians were celebrating for the sheer sake of celebrating, a short distance away, on the outskirts of the city, a platinium blonde man in his mid-twenties was tinkering on something that should have never been trifled with. He was taking a wrench and screwdriver to a machine that looked rather eerily like the shrinking machine from "Honey, I Shrunk the Kids", only colored entirely gun-metal-gray.
"That should do it," he said. He was Brian Simon Savage, a rather poor writer in his own right, but a mediocre inventor and exceptional engineer. His device was far more dangerous then he realized. "There. The Biblio-Immersion Ray should be functioning at optimal capacity."
One had to wonder if he even knew what he was talking about, as his nickname was "BS" -- a nickname that he despised to no end. And who could blame him for that?
Then he pressed a red button on the machine and it powered to life, with the "barrel" part of the ray glowing with white, almost ethereal light. Then he placed a book (a half-written book with rather crudely-drawn chapter pictures) upon the targeted area. Then he fired the ray, which looked rather wispy, like wind made into white light, at the book. Then the ray deactivated and powered down quite noticeably.
"Now," he said, his voice rather stupidly greedy, "to experience what all these publishers and literary agencies refused to acknowledge. The genius that they turned a blind eye to."
Clearly, Brian hadn't much common sense. Hadn't considered the possible consequences or dangers of this endeavor. He turned to the book, and looked hungrily. The book was glowing with the ray's light, the light licking at the pages. Any other person in their right mind would be able to tell that it wasn't right, would be able see the dangers of immersing themselves in an unfinished work with such a ray.
But Brian had carelessly ignored such things, and was foolishly single-minded in his work to bring himself into a world where he was king. A king that knew all, who could do no wrong. He placed his hand upon the pages on which he jotted down his innermost fantasy, and he was slurped inside like a spaghetti noodle into a hungry mouth. The energy seemed to disappate, but he soon discovered that he was now unable to return back to his world -- not that he really wanted to -- until his tale was complete.
He naively thought he could stay there, and his happiness would be neverending. He never once expected that his story to take on a life of its own. He never anticipated the assassination . . .
Outside the world, the book maintained a silvery-white glow, until Savage's death. Then the light disappated, but he wasn't spat out of the book, as one may have expected. His mind, body and soul was now forevermore trapped in the book. Only now he hadn't any control over what happened in his story, and he hadn't remembered that he left the stove on . . . and that potholder was a little too close to the hot burner . . .
