Memoirs of a RAFian

[Cloak]

I just wanted to get it up before Christmas ended for you.

New chapter.

CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO:
A Flasher

Cloak was dispatched to look into an odd occurrence in some crystal catacombs. He was hoping for a brief respite from that gruelling mission and the whole R. D. D. Act thing, but then again, he did undertake that whole thing on his own initiative and merits, so . . .

No rest for the weary, he guessed.

Anyway, the reports were vague. It could have been another Malice's scheme, or just another of Demos's fiend creations. There really wasn't much information to go off of, but the minute Cloak crossed the threshold and paid attention, he could definitely Earthsight something humanoid deep within the heart of this short, crystal-laden catacomb.

He approached with all the feline finesse he possessed. Their was a myriad of tunnels to navigate through. Right. Straightaway. Left, which widened into a small room, with three paths. Cloak took the middle path and headed right from it. Path turned right again. Then left. Then a path opened on his left, but he ignored it.

Then the path got windy for two turns, and then a sharp right, that sloped downward. It opened into a room double the size of the one before. Cloak kept plowing forward, ignoring the path immediately left of the threshold out of the room.

And so it went, until he came to the very heart of the catacombs, where the creature was waiting. The creature was bald, humanoid, with black irises and brown sclera. It had a pasty face upon a purple head framed by yellow. It had no nose. It had dark orange shoulder pads with yellow edgings, a yellow chest piece with purple beneath that, white thighs and upper arms, and yellow legs and lower arms with purple hands. The lower arms also possessed golden grieves on them, and its lower legs had purple "=" markings on them.

"You the big bad, huh?" Cloak said. He wasn't really impressed. Didn't help that it was roughly the size of Mickey Mouse. At least, the theme park equivalent. "One of Demos's fiends, right?"

No answer. Cloak wasn't too terribly sure these things could speak, but didn't articulate this confusion, as it would also be terribly rude. And because he wanted to get this over with.

"Okay, then" Cloak said, "then what's your schtick?"

No response. Cloak wasn't expecting one. But then it opened its hand and bright, blinding flash followed. The flash only lasted a few seconds, and Cloak's eponymous cloak flared a bit, buffered by some unseen force, but Cloak himself was unaffected. Whatever that force was, Cloak didn't know.

Now the creature moved, and he was abysmally slow. Slugma or Slowpoke terms of slow. The only thing he did quickly was fire multiple blasts of energy that Cloak would later recognize as chronal energy, much like what Chronians and Chronosapiens could wield. Cloak deflected them much like when Son Goku first battled Frieza, though, chances were that they wouldn't have fazed him much, if at all, even if they did hit home. His Realm Walker nature made such attacks not so great.

Yes, Realm Walkers do experience time, but that does mean that theirs could be manipulated so easily. If at all.

"That's your full powerset, huh?" Cloak asked rhetorically. He was pretty sure that he was right. "Then I think we should end this right now. And, if I'm not mistaken, and if you're anything like Flash Man, then . . ."

Cloak began an unrelenting barrage of fire-based attacks. He would have used metal-based attacks, but this area -- while prime on earth and air, had no metal within the immediate vicinity. So, Cloak relied on fire, despite his pyrophobia never really leaving him.

This Flasher, as Cloak hadn't any other name for it, fell quickly and Cloak immediately left, looking forward to a nice long rest. Or as much as he could get, considering he was a RAFian, and basically always on-call.

***

Demos called it a furassapien. He had no other prerogative to make it, other than to see if he could create a chronokinetic. He believed that he succeeded with this creature.

***

"Well," Malice said, watching the whole thing, "that was over in a flash."

[Cloak]

New chapter.

BOOK CXLI:
A BUGGY AFTERNOON
CHAPTER ONE:
Quick!

Aquilai was dispatched to a mountainside facility. He was told that it was abandoned and he was not given a reason for it existing, but he had a hunch that it was a former military base or military training facility or something of that sort of nature. He was also not given a reason for it being abandoned. Two questions the RAFians had no answers about -- which was also.part of his mission. To find out what the government may be hiding out here.

Aquilai was quite miffed to discover that the place's defenses were already live and well-armed, as he almost discovered with the death beams. Sure, he could use his sonic screwdriver and disable them. But he had to do so one at a time!! It very quickly proved to be quite tedious.

But eventually he had deactivated them all when he was nearly accosted by the creature. It was a very fast, very quick creature. The creature was svelte, humanoid, with black irises and brown sclera. It had a green head with a silver boomerang-like crest. Its upper arms were white with silver at the elbows and green lower arms and hands, with the right one containing a silver orifice where it could rapid fire out metallic boomerangs. It also had silver blades on the outside of its wrists that it could retract at any time it so wished. Its torso, to its waist, had a green chest piece with a silver boomerang marking dead center. Below its waist it was white until its silver knees. Below its knees, it was green.

Aquilai was in at a bit of a disadvantage -- there wasn't any water nearby that he could see to help him out. He almost wished that the rejuvenation thing last year hadn't reset his regeneration clock -- somehow. He still wasn't too terribly sure how that worked.

He even finished when the creature fired three quick boomerangs, but they all fell short. The boomerangs may have been quick and rapid fire, but the range was piddling and pathetic. Clearly only useful in more close-quarters battles, and not long-range fighting. But this creature was clearly not one of great intelligence, as it seemed to continually get caught on the most minute thing, as if he was a buggy video game character.

Eventually, the speedster landed a few blows on him, leaving him with gashes and such, but it wasn't sufficient enough to trigger a Regeneration. Aquilai managed to dig deep and find some water -- fortunately, it wasn't a full moon, so bloodbending wasn't an option. He didn't want that option, no matter how much easier it made his life. But found a small stream in which to defend himself.

He used it so to freeze the creature solid, and the mere fact that he stopped seemed to be killing him, almost as if he were like a shark, and always needed to be moving to respirate. This was very akin.

Before Aquilai was aware that this was even a thing -- the creature was dead.

***

Demos called it a velocisapien. He just made it to see if it was faster than a Citrakayah or a Kineceleran. This ultimately failed, as the velocisapien could only match their top speeds, not exceed them, and it had far less endurance than either, so it could not maintain its speed long enough to even garner a speed trail.

***

"Wow, that was quick," Malice noticed. She sounded vaguely disappointed.

[Cloak]

New chapter.

CHAPTER TWO:
Parker's Tale

Parker, GH, Leatherhead, Saffa, Abby, Helen, Quaf, and Hunter was sitting around a campfire, roasting marshmallows. Cloak was there, but he stood off to the side, just barely visible in the campfire's light. He had rested some, having nearly collapsed after the fiend and Walker debacle, but GH talked him into coming to this little get-together. He wasn't much for campfire stories at the moment -- he kept going over his actions in the Nexus, and wondered if he should have stuck around longer than he did.

But the Nexus was no longer his home. He might be more welcomed there now, but the "stigma" (which he really didn't consider it as such, but he knew some would) of being the only Walker (they still thought Malice was dead) to stay for an extended time in-Realm would still be adhered to him, no matter what he did. All these thoughts clung to his mind like a bunch of roosting bats. He had completely missed GH doing a rendition of "Upendi" for Helen and Parker.

Parker then started to describe an event some five, six years (Dweller time, of course) where he was investigating the crash of a saucer-like spacecraft. He initially expected something routine like a Skrit Na or something. Nothing too threatening.

Then he interviewed a woman with an incredible and traumatic story. But, unlike some other species, he could not have "corrected" her memory, or Obliviated her. That fell to someone else, if whenever possible.

But he was sure. It was alien power behind this.

Then his glibly skipped over what he considered to be the boring bits, which Cloak didn't approve of (because they might miss out on context), and, instead, went immediately to the exciting final battle. He described (in excruciating detail, strangely enough, for happening so long ago -- he must have been embellishing on some parts to add more drama) how the ****roach-like alien tore itself out of the human skin it stole, becoming much larger than the human farmer it was impersonating. It was at least seven feet long, with needle-sharp teeth as long as daggers and legs like a more dangerous Taxxon. Its eyes were the size of softballs, at least. And it was rusty red in color.

Parker described it attacking fast and hard (describing how it scuffed up his armor took a little away from the narrative, though). He also told of it thinking far too literally, as it apparently took "drop me" as "drop me in your mouth". He also mentioned that it was very quick to anger, something he admitted to underestimating.

Parker eventually matched it blow-for-blow. Cloak thought he was sounding a bit boastful, but he didn't say anything about it. He was still much too busy mulling over the description Parker gave of the beast, and he kept coming to one conclusion. And he hoped he was wrong -- they were a very dangerous species he was thinking of, if having a rather lackluster name for their species.

"What was it?" Leatherhead asked, after Parker finished. "The buggy?"

"I don't know what it was, exactly," Parker said, in a cavalier way Cloak thought was unnecessary. "If I'm honest."

"Sounds to me that it was a Bug," Cloak said, quietly and quite seriously.

"Weren't you listening?" Parker said, hiding some disappointment. "Of course, it was a bug! It was an alien bug!"

"Bug." Cloak repeated, with the same gravely serious tone of voice. "As in capital 'B' Bug. It's the name for a really volatile insectoid species who has a clear inferiority complex. You smash or squish or poison or otherwise kill an insect in their presence, it's a death sentence -- or at least a train to massive pain."

"You're serious?" GH asked.

"From what I know, which isn't everything," Cloak said, "Bugs thrive on carnage. They consume, infest, live off the dead and destroy other species -- or try to."

"He's serious," Hunter supplied GH.

"Feel fortunate enough that you didn't happen to kill on of the Bug Queen's favorite Bugs," Cloak warned, "or there'd be a bounty on your head. There are more than just one Bug."

[Cloak]

New chapter.

CHAPTER THREE:
Bug Bounty

Turns out that the Bug Parker slayed was named Edwin, and he actually was one of the Bug Queen's favorites. She had sent him to retrieve something from Earth, something only referred to as the Power Source, or the Galaxy. It was something of myth, like El Dorado or the Fountain of Youth or something of that nature.

Edwin, like most, if not all, Bugs, was extremely loyal to his Queen, possibly due to the insect hive mentality. He had left at once, the Queen believing that he was the only one necessary, as he was one of the most capable soldiers she had. Her favoritism was such that she gave him his own ship (which was presumably destroyed after Parker had slain the creature).

He had underestimated how to enter Earth's atmosphere and this saucer ship -- remarkably similar to a Skrit Na ship, but a tad smaller, built for one occupant -- turned into a flaming meteor destroying a farmer's truck as said farmer was being verbally abusive to his harried wife, claiming that his truck was the only one that pulled its weight (other than himself, of course). The same truck that the Bug crashed into, destroying utterly, as it dug out a divot in the ground. It was deep enough that a human would be unable to see Edwin until the came right up to the lip of the divot.

The farmer, coincidentally named Edwin, or Ed for short, came outside, less than pleased that his truck was obliterated. When his wife came after him, he told her to get "her big butt back into the house", before proceeding to the crash site with his meticulously-cared-for shotgun. The weapon he evidently loved more than his wife -- as pathetic as it sounds.

He strolled, bold as brass, up to the considerable divot where he met Edwin. The Bug asked him to place his shotgun upon the ground. Ed arrogantly told him that he could have his gun when he pries it from his cold, dead fingers. Edwin found these terms . . . acceptable, as he reached up and pulled Ed down into the divot with him, easily disarming him and relieving him of his skin as he tossed it aside, clothes still somehow intact, and it landed on the rim, the lip of the divot.

While still unseen to everyone but Edwin himself, he had eaten everything other than the skin, and, when he had finished, he had grabbed the Ed skin. With a lot of rather unnecessarily audible slurping sounds, he had managed to squeeze and compact himself enough to be able to fit the skin. That wasn't to say that he fit the skin ubiquitously -- it sagged someplaces in an inhuman way, with the appearance of skin hanging of bones. His eyes were clouded and distinctly different. His nostrils seemed to be more prominent. Bugs clearly lacked the compression field tech of the Slitheen, though they needn't worry about a gas exchange.

Anyway, he cracked his neck and snapped his disguised jaws and went back to the farmhouse to ask for sugared water. . . .

Long story short, he went to a variety of places, looking for this "Galaxy" thing, which was apparently some sort of power source, and he repeatedly failed in finding it. This didn't make him very happy, especially since the ship he arrived on would never fly again. He was essentially planet-locked, as he did not know of any other spacecraft capable of.leaving the Earth's orbit under its own power. Which made it a good thing that the RAFians were very much a nonentity to the Bugs.

Then Parker killed Edwin.

And word had only reached the Bug Queen just a scant few months ago. While the rest of the hive knew and felt her fury, she sent Edward and Eduardo -- both brothers of Edwin, but technically they were all brothers -- to assassinate Parker on the promise of a tempting bounty of an unspecified amount of the queen's jelly, a form of currency amongst the Bugs, apparently. If they failed, she would open up the bounty to all of her children, her hive.

They were not to come back, alive or dead, unless their duty was done. She sent them on a single ship, and it landed in a extremely rural place -- near a ranch house upon a swamp, inhabited only by two backwoods brothers, both average builds with the younger one being slight bigger and slightly dumber than his older brother.

It played out the same way it did with Edwin. The two brothers, Teddy and Bobby, became skin disguises for the two Bugs, as they searched for Parker. But they left their ship behind, thinking it would be perfectly fine and undetected in the swamp.

[Cloak]

New chapter.

CHAPTER FOUR:
Unsettled and Nettled

"Teddy" and "Bobby" stumbled away from their ranch house with a real awkward-looking gait. Most people would just look and see their stumbling, ambling walking and would simply just assume that they had decided to get real drunk again -- apparently something the two brothers were actually quite known to do, not knowing their drinking limits. How would they know that two extraterrestrial bugs were wearing their skins like a bad cosplay?

These two were great Bug warriors, but they didn't have the common sense of Edwin. They had left their ship behind, thinking that that it was well camouflaged in the swamp (it really wasn't). They just went about their business, looking for Parker. They stopped a woman on a street and asked her, in a strangled voice that sounded nothing like Teddy or Bobby's voices.

"Ew! Get away from me, creeps!" she said, utterly repulsed by their slovenly, emaciated appearances and cloudy eyes. It was really remarkable how unobservant the layman can be, as it was clear that she just thought that these two were just supremely hideous-looking human perverts. In fact, she called them perverts as she strode away from them very quickly, without looking back once.

They were very obviously not going to get the information they wanted this way. They couldn't just come out of their hastily-made disguises and demand Parker be brought to them -- that would attract too much attention for their liking. As well as increase the likelihood that they'd beef up security around him, much like they did when their Queen was in danger. Making it all the more difficult for them to accomplish their assassination task.

The other humans gave them a wide birth, as they seriously looked like people who's skin was hanging off their bones, Teddy and Bobby having been men with rather large, ample frames. These were not the best choices as disguises, they were just taken because of convenience.

Maybe if they found a human suit dealer . . .

***

"That is definitely Bug," Cloak said. He, Odie, Abby, Hunter, Aquilai, and Wild having quickly located the spacecraft.

"You have admitted to not being able to recognise tech of other species before," Odie claimed, "why should we believe your conclusions now?"

"Why did we bring him along, again?" Abby asked Aquilai. She seriously harbored a genuine dislike from him, especially after the Patches debacle.

Naturally, one would think that that event would humble the human, but no. He just brushed aside this mistake and attempted to defleft the blame whenever anyone called him out on it, attempting to subvert responsibility. He refused to acknowledge that he was ever wrong. Cloak couldn't get angry, because he knew where this path led. He knew because he had watched his mother walk this path, and he had learned what happens to those who refuse to see that they have done wrong. Alone. Friendless. A miserable old spinster -- or whatever the male equivalent of that was.

"Point of fact," Cloak said, without emotion, "I said that I may not know the names of the particular tech, but I can identify the superficial hallmarks of some species."

"Blah blah blah," Odie said, rather childishly, flapping his fingers and thumb in the universal way that conveyed the message that he thought what Cloak was saying was devoid of substance. Cloak allowed himself to feel a stab of annoyance, before allowing it to pass quickly. There were more productive uses of his time than to get irked by a spoiled, narcissistic brat. Cloak even managed to tune out what Odie said next, by Aquilai and Hunter calling him over.

"There's tracks," Hunter said, using a claw to indicate them in the muddy ground.

"Yes, they look like Bug tracks," Cloak said, "if memory serves."

"If they're still there, then these tracks must still be fresh," Hunter said, expertly. "It only rained two, three nights ago."

"Can we please stop wasting our time here?!" Odie demanded, like a petulant baby.

"That's it," Abby said, sound thoroughly fed up. "Imma take care of this."

"Take a look at this ship," Aquilai said, "see that end there? I don't think this thing can fly out of here again."

"It's smashed to bits," Hunter noted, checking the area Aquilai indicated. "But how are we going to find these Bugs? The scent -- I'm assuming that that's their scent -- is stale."

"We may not have to," Wild said, thoughtfully. "They'll be after something right? We can just go and procure it before they do. Then they'll have to come to us."

Before anyone could say anything else, Odie was heard to screech like a particularly loud and obnoxious banshee, "Hey! Leggo! LEGGO!!"

"If you want to act like a child," Abby said, clearly irritated into anger. A side of Abby nobody has ever really seen. "Then you'll get treated as a child."

"You don't have any right to push me like that. I'll -- I'll . . . I'll . . ." Odie trailed off -- clearly, Abby had decided to pacify him but morphing into a Psycholeopterran and have him see the alien bug's illusions.

<Okay, guys, I got this idiot to shut up,> she called over to the others in private thought-speak, <but do try and finish in the next hour and 59 minutes, please. Never thought I'd miss Rotiart like this.>

"The Bugs will be after Parker, assuming the Bug he killed was their hive queen's favorite," Cloak said, at once.

"That's a lot of assumptions, though," Aquilai cautioned.

"We can't be too careful," Wild said. "We'll have to put a guard over him, to be sure."

"He won't like that," Cloak and Hunter said at the same time.

"He may not have a choice," Wild said, darkly.

[Cloak]

Sorry for the lateness.

New chapter.

CHAPTER FIVE:
Inferiority Complex

There was a major flaw in the two's plan beyond their rather obvious disguises, which looked almost like something out of "The Walking Dead". (And it was amazing just how desensitized some people were towards things out of the ordinary like that, but this is the same city that had to endure attacks from supernatural creatures and aliens . . . so it may have been that that desensitized them, actually.)

They were not making any headway into finding Parker, the two needed to find human suits that would legitimately make them look human, not like shambling "The Walking Dead" zombies. They had no concept or knowledge of a black market, where such things are infrequently sold at exorbitant prices. Then again, it's not in the Bugs' nature to purchase things, especially when they can just take them.

They heard a rumbling to their left and saw a large van with the name "Bugbusters" emblazoned upon the side of the the van, with a bug inside a red circle with a line through it. Now, Bugs may not have been among the smartest species in existence, but it didn't take a genius to figure out what the pictogram meant. And Bugs were very sensitive about things like that -- hypersensitive, even.

Four men excited from the van, dressed in thick, beige, canvas-like jumpsuits. They put on devices that looked like one of those stupid backpack vacuums, only the nozzle on the end was tiny and looked much like a "7" shape. They were exterminators -- or pest control specialist, if you want to get PC about it.

The first man was the shortest of the lot with laidback, womanizer personality. He was evidently the man behind the finances of the small business the four were running. His name tag on his jumpsuit said Murray, and the others referred to him as Pete.

The second man was a tall, blond man. He was the only one of the four who wore glasses -- his had thick, black frames. He was the most bookish and technical of the lot, and evidentally in charge of the creation and maintenance of all their tech, despite their low resources. His name tag was labeled Spengler and he was addressed as Harold.

The third man was a round-faced, redheaded optimist. He held the most passion and energy of the group, and was unofficially involved with motivating them. Officially, he was responsible for most of the clerical work and upkeep of the files and whatnot. His name tag said Stantz, and he was addressed as Dan or Danny.

The fourth and final man was a tall, dark man who tended to ground the group in reality. He was the newest member, and could bring that outside point-of-view in. His name tag said Hudson, and he was addressed as Winston.

And they're all now dead. The Bugs didn't take too kindly to their chosen profession, and killed them quickly and efficiently. But they both knew that none of these four were their target, they just felt an unstoppable urge to destroy them.

But this wasn't their story, not yet.

[Cloak]

New chapter.

CHAPTER SIX:
Increased Security

"You're blowing this out of proportion," Parker said, feeling thoroughly nettled and just a tad henpecked. "I'm fine."

"This is for your own safety, dearest," Helen said. "The added security detail will lessen the likelihood that the Bugs will make a play to assassinate you."

"I killed one with no problem," Parker said, mulishly.

"That was one, these are two," Hunter said, firmly. "That makes it more dangerous for you to have you back uncovered, so to speak."

Cloak said nothing. He didn't intercede on Parker's benefit because he knew what was going to happen. He wasn't precognitive, he was just perceptive. And the Realm Walker would be prepared for it either way. He was devising a contingency . . .

"He doesn't want it," Odie said. It was amazing how he could make everything he said sound so . . . so self-serving. "Why do we have to force him into it?"

Parker wasn't thrilled that Odie was taking his side, with all his obviously obdurate acts he made in the past. No one forgotten how pertinacious that Odie was when Patches was involved. (He still won't waste time in scapegoating Patches for everything -- it's become quite tiresome at this point, to again and again and again hear these needless truculent accusations flung willy-nilly.) This had earned him the ire of Parker as well as many more RAFians -- and, yet, Odie seemed oblivious to it. He only saw himself in a very aggrandizing light.

"Dearest, please," Helen said, pleading with her eyes. She did not know how else to impress upon him the seriousness of the situation. She had once had a . . . a confrontation with a swarm of Bugs as a novice Star Sapphire. The more experienced one she was teamed up with . . . well, she didn't make it. She knew the dangers of these creatures. She knew that they were not to be taken lightly, that they were a force not to be trifled with. Parker only came up against one -- and the battle was not easily won. "Bugs are horrible creatures. I've seen -- and was helpless to stop -- them ravage a planet before. I lost a good friend in that bout. Don't be flippant about this, my love. Please, believe that we fear for your wellbeing. Please, love, understand this. It is very important."

"But, Helen, this is --"

She pressed two fingers over his lips to silence him. He didn't understand. He didn't understand the sheer scope of what was going on here. She had to make him understand.

"Love, Bugs are not to be taken lightly," she said. "Overconfidence is often the biggest flaw in most heroic personalities, but a flaw that can easily be exploited, especially by a smart enough species. Please, my dear Parker, don't let this be you. Let your fatal flaw be something else, something other than the overconfidence that breeds carelessness and laziness like an alley cat swollen with kittens."

"Helen, you don't under--"

"But I do," Helen interrupted. "At least, I think I do. You are confident -- overconfident -- that your armor makes you impervious to attack. You and I both know that this is fundamentally not true."

Before he could protest, she continued, in an almost breatheless manner, "Your armor is impressive, it is true, but it is not infallible. Nothing is. Overreliance on an object like that is dangerous in and of itself."

"Like your ring?" Parker sniped, still feeling nettled.

"I can fight without my ring, as you plainly know," she told him severely. "Now, do your best to be a good boy and don't leave the forum, please.

[Cloak]

New chapter.

CHAPTER SEVEN:
Lockdown

Just to exemplify just how cautious the RAFians were taking this, the entire forum was being locked down. Code: Avalon was on its highest setting, despite being a rather power guzzler -- their power source (a gigantic, fanged Pikachu with a fondness for seal flesh locked in a generator-like cage, snoozing away the day) didn't experience any hiccups, though.

But . . . just like last time, some the RAFians -- many of which who has never been on a mission in their lives -- started getting riled up.

One named Frank Rosenbaum said, "Oh no. I've got the madness! I've got forum fever!"

"I've got it, too!" another, this one named Olaf Jones, said.

Then all but a few RAFians exclaimed, "FORUM FEVER!!"

Then the obligatory music played. They sang:

"I got forum fever -- it's burning in my brain!
I've got forum fever, it's driving me insane!
We got forum fever, we're flipping our bandannas!
Been stuck in here so long, we have simply gone bananas!!"

<It's only been fifteen minutes,> Russell groaned. But he was ignored.

"Ariba!
Chica chica boom!
A chica chica boom boom chic!
Chica chica boom!
A chica chica boom boom chic!"

<Seriously?> Russell sighed, resigned to this. They sang:

"We got cabin fever, we've lost what sense we had!!
We got cabin fever, we're all going mad!!"

"Every time," Phoenix noted as they watched this.

A RAFian named Barty Donaldson sang, like a square dance caller:

"Grab your partner by the ears.
Lash him to some steel,
Do-si-do, step on his toe,
Listen to him squeal.
Allemande left, allemande right,
It's time to post or fink.
Swing your partner over the side,
Drop him in the drink."

"We don't even lockdown the forum that regularly," Ash commented. "I even forget when the last time we did was."

Tiana DeMilo, another RAFian, sang in a snooty way:

"We got forum fever.
No ifs, ands, or buts.
We're disoriented,
And demented.
And a little nuts."

Cloak was watching this, too, for a time. But he remained in the shadows, unseen by all. He knew it would happen. And this song and dance was the perfect distraction. It should have been predictable, when the mods agreed upon this decision to lockdown the forum -- this basically happens every time. So much so, that the joke is rather stale by now.

"Ach du lieber Volkswagen car,
(Yodel-lay-ee-hoo)
Sauerkraut and wienerschnitzel,
Und the wunder bar!
(Yodel-lay-ee-hoo)"

"Well," Quaf said, "that didn't make a lick of sense."

They sang

"We were sailing, sailing the wind was on our side."

Then Otis Carey, a by-the-book RAFian (yes, rather a contradictory statement in and of itself) sang:

"And then it died."

"So melodramatic," Goom said, with only passing interest.

Theresa Jackson, another lesser known RAFian, sang:

"I was floating 'neath a tropic moon,
And dreaming of a blue lagoon.
Now I'm crazy as a loon!"

Then everyone but those few veteran RAFians sang:

"Forum fever has ravaged all aboard.
This once proud forum has become a veritable psycho ward!
We were posting, posting headed who knows where!!
And now, though we're all here . . .
We're not all there!"

"This is so redundant," Shen said. He found it boring that this seemed to happen every time the forum was locked down. Granted, it was at least a year ago when the last time happened, so . . .

Anyway, they finished:

"Forum fever!
AAHHH!!"

With that done, they all dispersed to go about their own activities. Meanwhile, the spot of shadow that Cloak occupied was now inconspicuously vacated and empty, without a word or sound as to where the Realm Walker went.


SOURCE SONG: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=msn9gSVVT_4.

[Cloak]

New chapter.

CHAPTER EIGHT:
Thirst to Prove Himself

Parker was fully decked out in his armor and he was glad he still had some adaptive camouflage -- the ripping out of the Realm Walker tech didn't rob him of that. Granted, it wouldn't hide his footsteps or position from someone with Earthsight . . .

No. No, Cloak would have been far too distracted with that whole song and dance from the lesser known RAFians. A perk of having so many is that it was easy to get overlooked in the thick of things. They would have disguised his exit from the forum.

"Don't you start on me, Tyr," Parker muttered, just as he crossed the threshold of Code: Avalon before it became truly solid, permeated only by air and atmosphere. No way that even Cloak could have escaped that unnoticed. Parker knew that Cloak would just try to stop him, and he knew Helen would be furious with him. But he felt that this must be done.

They were all doubting his capabilities. They were all doubting his fighting ability. He took down one of these Bugs already. Two couldn't be all that much harder, it stood to reason in his head. They were all really making too much of a big deal about this. His armor would easily protect him against any threat. So what if it was still a little damaged from his encounter with Blastjaws and the Walker kid. He had repaired it, the damage was nothing but cosmetic. Although he did lose his dual fusion cannons when they did that, but Parker could adapt. He could, though the others apparently believed him to be a fragile flower, he thought bitterly.

He really didn't need these admonishments from Tyr. He knew what he was doing. He knew what he was capable of. He knew that he would show them all, that he would, once again, prove himself in their eyes. He would show them that they were wrong. He would --

Noise! Seven o'clock.

Nothing. He could see nothing. Tyr was interfering with any possible scanning -- causing Parker to tell him off in . . . in some flowery language. The noise was brief, but nothing was there. He had really wished that it wasn't night and pitch black out. Even the moon seemed to be hiding away. Everything had a real ominous feel to it, but that was not sufficient enough to deter Parker. He could be as obstinate as Cloak at times.

He would accomplish his objective. He would prove them all wrong. He would. He was determined to do so. This was vitally important, he had considered everything, weighed everything. He made no mistakes. He was well-armed and well-prepared, though the others couldn't see it. Instead they smother him with unneeded security protocols. They wanted to secret him away as if he were naught but a rare jewel that they wanted to selfishly guard.

Despite himself, his heart roiled with bitterness and resentment. A volatile ****tail that can easily transmute into rage and hatred if too concentrated. It was an inevitability when you restrict someone's freedom involuntarily, no matter the intent behind such circumstances.

A rustling bush! Two o'clock!

Parker knew she saw movement of some sort. He heard the rustling, though almost as if there was a time delay. He steadied his entire body, focused his mind, as he prepared for battle. But when a harmless chipmunk jumped out and ran across the path, Parker actually felt disappointed.

It would take him another two hours and twenty minutes before he finally stumbled upon the two in their emaciated disguises. He was confident that he had come upon the right two, and he called out to them.

And addressed them as "squish-ables". . .

[Cloak]

New chapter.

CHAPTER NINE:
More Than He Bargained For

Parker still believed that he was prepared for this battle. He still believed that he was well-equipped to deal with these two monsters. Even when he announced his presence to them, even when he called them "squish-ables", he was confident he had what it took.

He failed to factor in that he did not easily slay Edwin. He failed to consider that Edwin proved very difficult to slay, and the time since had warped his recollections, that time may have colored and recolored his remembrances of those events.

But he was not deterred. He had his armaments. He had his armor. He had Tyr (despite the parent-like disapproval he was giving him). He was ready. He was as ready as he ever was going to be.

His foolishness and courage were not altered in the slightest when the Bugs shucked their disguises, and tossed them aside. Revealling their true sizes to be about two or three times the size of your average Taxxon, while being much faster and stronger (even more than Edwin, due to how much the Bug Queen coddled Edwin) but Parker still refused to admit that he was in over his head.

The battle started off badly. He struggled to shoot a single one of them. He was sure the other one, the one who he didn't know whose name was Edwin, was not this fast. He was even having trouble keeping track of both of them. His shots were slightly on the wild side as all he was really seeing was a flash of legs, chitinous bodies, teeth, and bulbous eyes.

This wasn't how it was supposed to go down. He was too proud to admit that he was in over his head. He was too proud to admit that he needed help. He was too proud to admit that he should have had gone out with some backup. In a manner of moments he would be overwhelmed, and his only thought was that he should have brought a bigger arsenal. And that Helen was going to be furious with him, if he survived this ordeal.

But then that's when the two were skewered by two jagged, earthen spikes which retreated back into the ground whence they came just as quickly. The ground was smoothed over, without a trace of the spikes that had erupted from them just a scarce few moments ago. The two Bug collapsed, dead, unaware of the presence of their killer. But Parker knew right away who it was, and he wasn't happy.

"I had it handled, Cloak," Parker snarled, standing up, as Cloak remained unseen for the moment.

"Don't lie or posture to me, Parker," Cloak said, and Parker could see that his eyes were like golden-scarlet suns. Always a danger sign. "You were unmatched and overwhelmed. You had foolhardily rushed into a battle you only scant prepared for! Had I not noticed and Earthsighted your flight in time, you would be dead by now."

"I would have done fine!"

"Put your Gatebursting ego to the side, and look at it pragmatically!!" Cloak said, mastering his powers, reigning them in, allowing himself to get angry without losing control. It was always a hard, laborious thing to do. One reason Cloak tried very hard not to rage. "You would have died -- yes, died -- had I not acted when I did. I couldn't have stopped you from spouting off those idiotic one-liners you clearly thought was clever banter."

"You hypocrite!" Parker countered. "You've done the same thing! You've gone off half-****ed and unprepared before!!"

"But I had the power to back it up!!" Cloak returned. "The elements never leave me -- you can easily run out of ammunition and you plasma sword their can break or somehow fail you otherwise! And if all else fails, I can always take off my cloak and let my corona finish things. That just my Realm Walker physiology. You don't have such advantages! Without your armor, you would have been eviscerated eighty-six ways before you could have formed a coherent thought!"

"But I have my armor!"

"Which has already been damaged when Blastjaws ripped the Walker tech from it!" Cloak said, his counter ready. "Don't tell me it's fixed or the damage is just cosmetic! I can see it charred and sparking!! You would not have survived another blow . . . Veil, another strike -- smartly placed -- might have led it to explode, killing you. Possibly the Bugs in some sort of kamikaze way."

Parker was going to protest, but Cloak cut across him.

"No, Parker! You're not going to deflect or obfuscate this. Tonight, you acted rashly and irresponsibly. Two things, I must say, aren't like you." Cloak said, his anger ebbing away now. "And if you think my scoldings are bad, just wait until Helen gets ahold of you."

[theyoungphoenix]

oh snap. parker is gonna get ripped a new one pretty soon =d

[Cloak]

And then some.

New chapter.

CHAPTER TEN:
Helen's . . . Dismay

"Parker!?!" Helen said, as she saw a helmetless Parker cross the threshold. He gave a churlish little smile and opened his arms slightly, as if he were expecting a hug. She stomped her way over to him, and, before he could really process this, she ****ed her arm back.

WHAAAP!!

She slapped him so hard that she had left a red mark and hurt her hand. As expected by and warned by Cloak, Helen was absolutely livid. She was pleased that he was alive and well, sure. But she was quite cross with him for obviously not listening to her copious amount a warnings. Parker was glad that he couldn't hear Tyr's admonishments or his praises of Helen's actions.

Helen looked as if she wanted to rage at Parker, to attack him as violently as possible. Her ring, which she rarely, if ever, took off, burst and pulsated with violet energy. Helen's rage, her fear, her hope, they were all fueled by her love, thus why the ring's flare up of power. She managed to valiantly regain and keep her composure. Cloak found it admirable, as he knew firsthand how to quell powerful emotions.

"Parker, I'm very disappointed in you," she said, as evenly as she could, though her voice warbled a bit with held back emotion.

"Helen, I --"

"You could have been killed." Helen said, a bit of her anger seeping out. "You deliberately disobeyed me. Disobeyed everyone! We all had your best interests at heart. We weren't putting the heightened security on you because we didn't think you could handle it, but because we knew you were unequipped to handle two. Handle two at the same time."

Parker, despite himself, couldn't help but feel a little resentment that his girlfriend was lecturing him and scolding him like a child. But he had momentarily forgotten that Helen was actually quite perceptive when she wanted to be.

"You think I'm treating you like a child, don't you?" she said, astutely.

Parker said nothing, but looked a bit churlish.

"Well, then don't act one!" she said, hotly. She was unable to hold back her anger any longer. She was now scolding him so much he would have probably more preferred to have received a magical Howler letter instead, or fight an Howler's howl. "Honestly, Parker!! Did you honestly think you needed to prove yourself to us?! To me?!"

Parker tried to interject, but Helen was actually more frightening right now than a saber-toothed cat.

"After all this time, how can it be that you've learned nothing?!" Helen raged unfiltered now. "I . . . I thought that you knew me, Parker. I thought my word meant something to you. Now I see . . . I must have been mistaken. You don't trust my judgement at all. You trust your judgement, even when it's categorically wrong, over mine."

She turned away, to hide her tears. Parker tried in vain to placate her, to pacify her, but they were just empty words to her now. Neither was looking at this situation rationally, Cloak could see that right now. He should try to mediate them, but Helen's emotions were understandable, and to act too soon could backfire tremendously.

Parker reached for her, to embrace her, to try to quell the tears. But she pulled away. She was too hurt for it, too hurt to hide her feelings behind a mask of stoicism. She moved away, stopping only to speak once last time.

"If you can't trust me, Parker, then we cannot be together," she said, as her ring's light seemed to dim (but not extinguish). "It's over. It's over between us."

Then she dashed away from a stunned Parker.

[theyoungphoenix]

oh yikes...

[Cloak]

Yep. And here are some new book ideas. Consider this like the Steven bomb, only a "Memoirs bomb". And, yes, that was a Steven Universe reference.

• Book MCXIII (1,118): "Crystal Chrysalis Catalyst" -- The RAFians and an opposing faction vie for eighteen man-sized crystal chrysalides.
• Book MCXIX (1,119): "Breakneck Blitz" -- The deep pink crystal chrysalis hatches.
• Book MCXX (1,120): "Omnimmunity" -- The RAFians must help a suicidal teen who is immune to everything and has lost just as much.
• Book MCXXI (1,121): "All-Out Pummeling" -- The orange crystal chrysalis hatches.
• Book MCXXII (1,122): "The Medusa" -- The RAFians must help and protect Yarin from an ambulatory plant that nullifies psionic powers and eats the now-helpless psionic beings.
• Book MCXXIII (1,123): "Hydro Vortex" -- The blue crystal chrysalis hatches.
• Book MCXXIV (1,124): "All Alone" -- GH awakens in what appears to be a post-apocalyptic world, all by himself, the seemingly only survivor. But all is not what it seems.
• Book MCXXV (1,125): "Inferno Overdrive" -- The red crystal chrysalis hatches.
• Book MCXXVI (1,126): "The DNA Archive" -- The RAFians meet the Last Genetic Record of the Realm, and it is someone they met in the past.
• Book MCXXVII (1,127): "Bloom Doom" -- The green crystal chrysalis hatches.
• Book MCXXVIII (1,128): "Dangerous Gifts" -- Lethifold trafficking has become a problem, one that the RAFians must stop.
• Book MCXXIX (1,129): "Continental Crush" -- The gray crystal chrysalis hatches.
• Book MCXXX (1,130): "Cagey Cats" -- A lioness Realm Walker tries to enlist Cloak's help in a coup to take over the Council, and institute an "ailurocracy". She has no interest, political or not, whatsoever in the Realms.
• Book MCXXXI (1,131): "Neverending Nightmare" -- The indigo crystal chrysalis hatches.
• Book MCXXXII (1,132): "Queenly Majesty? NOT!" -- The Bug Queen decides to take things into her own claws and heads to Earth herself.
• Book MCXXXIII (1,133): "Shattering Psyche" -- The violet crystal chrysalis hatches.
• Book MCXXXIV (1,134): "Toxic Luck" -- The black market is inundated with Felix Felicitus, which people drink to excess.
• Book MCXXXV (1,135): "Black Hole Eclipse" -- The black crystal chrysalis hatches.
• Book MCXXXVI (1,136): "The Warden's Reluctant Enforcers" -- Four exterminator ghosts are bound to a malevolent spirit for almost a decade. It becomes the RAFians' responsibility to free them.
• Book MCXXXVII (1,137): "Gigavolt Havoc" -- The yellow crystal chrysalis hatches.
• Book MCXXXVIII (1,138): "Corkscrew Crash" -- The silver crystal chrysalis hatches.
• Book MCXXXIX (1,139): "Savage Spin-Out" -- The olive green crystal chrysalis hatches.
• Book MCXL (1,140): "Oh, Brother" -- Underseen enlists the help of AniDragon to end the threat of four people "close" to him.
• Book MCXLI (1,141): "Acid Downpour" -- The purple crystal chrysalis hatches.
• Book MCXLII (1,142): "Overcompetitive Spirit" -- The RAFians must deal with a Nikephaetos.
• Book MCXLIII (1,143): "Supersonic Skystrike" -- The golden crystal chrysalis hatches.
• Book MCXLIV (1,144): "Everything You Know is Wrong" -- Abby awakens to find herself in a world where everything is off and wrong.
• Book MCXLV (1,145): "Tectonic Rage" -- The brown crystal chrysalis hatches.
• Book MCXLVI (1,146): "Daughters of the Damned" -- Four Bug Princesses become Bug Queens, something unprecedented, and the RAFians are on guard, in case they place their sights on Earth again.
• Book MCXLVII (1,147): "Twinkle Tackle" -- The pale pink crystal chrysalis hatches.
• Book MCXLVIII (1,148): "Coming to Terms . . . With a Vengeance!" -- The three Bug Queens mourn the death of their "sister queen". And they thirst for vengeance.
• Book MCXLIX (1,149):"Devastating Drake" -- The beige crystal chrysalis hatches.
• Book MCL (1,150): "The Other Side of Oblivion" -- Cloak reads up on the theories behind what lies beyond the Oblivion Veil.
• Book MCLI (1,151): "Subzero Slammer" -- The white crystal chrysalis hatches.

Yes, I know that was a lot, as this was the culmination of ideas from the past week or so. Anyway, as always, titles are subject to change.

You know, it's funny. I considered just ending Memoirs at Book 1,000. Maybe that would have been wise . . . but, eh.

New chapter.

CHAPTER ELEVEN:
Bug Queen of Mean

Meanwhile, back on the Bug homeworld, the Bug Queen was mercifully unaware of Edward and Eduardo's blatant failure and unceremonious demise. She sang, rather somberly, yet menacingly:

"In my kingdom,
No unworthy plant shall grow.
No one will defile it.
Not a star shall glow.
No one should care.
Only my word be true.
No rule would be fair to you.
I promise you!"

She gave a wicked chortle, that somehow sounded full of mirth and mirthless at the same time.

"It feels delicious
To be so vicious!
I'm the Bug Queen of Mean!
So delightful
To be so spiteful!
I'm the Bug Queen of Mean!
If I choose,
I'll destroy and demolish,
Arrest and abolish,
Everyone I've known!
Stand in my way,
And you'll never be remembered,
'Coz I'll turn you into bone!
I'm the Bug Queen of Mean.
I'm the meanest being,
You've ever seen!!
So, have no doubt
About my clout!
I'm the Bug Queen of Mean!
It's simply yummy
To be so crummy!!
I'm the Bug Queen of Mean!
I'm so grateful
To be so hateful!
I'm the Bug Queen of Mean!
When I want,
I'll pillage and plunder!
I'll bellow and thunder!
Make you sick and moan.
Get in my way, and I'll turn
You into bone!!
I'm the Bug Queen of Mean!
I'm the meanest being
You've ever seen!!
Have no doubt
About my clout.
I'm the Bug Queen of Mean!
Salute me, I deem!
I DEEM!
I'm the Bug Queen of Mean!
I'm the meanest being
You've ever seen!!
Have no doubt
About my clout.
I'm the Bug Queen of Mean!!"

She did notice how another of the saucer ships had left, this time carrying three Bugs named Donald, Reginald, and Ronald (well, in English anyway). They were intending to poach the bounty, going against the Queen's decree that it should be Edward and Eduardo to accomplish the task. The alluring promise of the queen's jelly was just too tantalizing for the three to pass up. All three were from different, specialized castes.

Donald shined a sapphire blue with a chitinous luster. He was at least as long as two bottle-nosed dolphins placed snout to tail. His physiology was rather like a water spider and he was clearly made for aquatic combat and such, though requiring air to breathe. His particular brand of Bug was only really employed on wet, aquatic worlds, which he could devastate easily.

Reginald's chitinous body shined a ruby red luster. His was a burrowing caste, designed for dry, subterranean worlds with inhospitable surfaces. He was about a quarter the size of a Slamworm, and skilled at subterranean battle.

Ronald had an lustrous emerald green body with large gossamer wings and a long, penetrating proboscis. His caste was for air support and specialized in aerial attacks. His caste was used on any world that air support was a viable option.

The thing about Bugs was that they had a variable caste system, with each caste surprisingly specialized for a specific purpose, not unlike Gems. Assuming that they've ever made contact with the inorganic species with human construct bodies, it could explain where this caste system bubbled up from.

And it should be mentioned that differing castes don't always get along, but the lure of the bounty has forced these three to compromise. To get to Earth and exterminate the Slayer of their Queen's favorite. Fortunately, the three really didn't have the capacity for resentment, at least within their own species.

Anyway, they sped to Earth, their gravity engines working overtime. . . .


SOURCE SONG: https://youtube.com/watch?v=4ZXVdPr6y44

[Cloak]

New chapter.

CHAPTER TWELVE:
Not Easily Mended

"Helen?"

No answer.

"Helen?"

Silence.

"Helen, c'mon," Parker said. He had immediately regretted his actions when he saw how hurt Helen was.

Nothing.

"Helen, please," Parker appealed, to no avail. Helen would not open her thread's door. Helen felt incredibly hurt by her perception of Parker's malfeasance.

No answer.

"Helen, I -- look, I'm sorry, okay?"

The door didn't even open a crack, and, yes, Helen was inside. She just didn't want to hear his apologies, regardless of sincerity. She felt immensely hurt -- she regarded his departure despite the RAFians doing everything they could to protect him  as a serious betrayal.

"I mean it, Helen!" Parker protested. "Helen, I'm sorry --"

"Just go away, Parker!" she shouted through the door.

"Helen, I --" Parker began, before feeling a hand on his shoulder.

"Parker, let her have some time away," Cloak said.

Cloak could see the resistance in Parker's face (he wasn't wearing his helmet), and saw it quickly crumble into acquiescence. The Realm Walker led him away from the Star Sapphire's door. Parker's hearing could not allow him to hear anything beyond Helen's room. But Cloak could. Cloak could hear her Sniffling and her sobs that she clearly tried to hide.

"We need to have a talk," Cloak said.

***

"I have no need for pontifications and lectures, Realm Walker," Parker said, surly and aggressive.

"And you've done so well without, on your own," Cloak said, with tones of sly, acidic sarcasm.

"What would you know?" Parker snarled, feeling nettled again. Cloak didn't rise in anger. That had long passed. "You don't even have a girlfriend! You don't know what's it's like!"

Cloak said nothing. He allowed the silence to elapse into uncomfortable, awkward territory. Though only Parker felt it.

"Yes, it is true that I don't have a significant other, or a partner, or a mate, or a girlfriend, whichever term is applicable," Cloak said, calmly, "but that does not make me immune for being perceptive. It is true that I do not precisely know the ins and outs of how humans court and such, as Realm Walker courtship customs will inevitably differ. Maybe a lot, maybe not."

"Quit beating around the bush," Parker said, folding his arms almost haughtily. Cloak knew this was a nonverbal cue that Parker was being defensive and trying to protect himself. "Say whatever lecture you're dying to give me. We both know how you like to go on at length. You monologue like a Saturday morning cartoon villain."

Cloak said nothing once more, and allowed the silence to stretch into awkwardness again.

"Are you done?" Cloak asked.

"What?" Parker snapped.

"Are you done?" Cloak repeated.

Parker was starting to feel annoyed.

Cloak clarified, "Are you done going through the motions? Are you ready to think about this rationally, or are you going to continue to be angry and miserable?"

Before Parker could answer, Xeno came onto the forum-wide intercom, announcing that an incursion from space was violating Earth space. Cloak was among those dispatched to investigate, which left Parker feeling mulish and jealous.

"Well, go then!" he snarled.