Memoirs of a RAFian

[Cloak]

You probably could tell what parodies this will contain -- until I throw you a bit of a curve ball, that is.

CHAPTER TWO:
What the Heck is That?

Suddenly, Horse awakens from her thread, as she dashed out, she sang:

"What's that racket?
What's that clatter?"

Then Parker was immediately on his feet . . . apparently, he slept in his armor.  He donned his helmet whilst singing:

"We're under attack!
It's a life-or-death matter!"

Underseen exited his thread, yawned, and still looked rather sleepy.  He sang:

"I was in a deep-sleep RAFian Dream."

Wild declared in song:

"I heard what I believed to be a scream!"

Jack jabbed a rather accusatory finger at Alic:

"That wasn't me, that was mama!"

Alic countered this:

"Uh, no, I was just startled!"

Blue, ever practical, asked:

"But, what was that light?"

Then Gaz finished the thought:

"In the middle of the night?"

Wild was consulting Dino:

"You have it your sights?"

Then a shiver went up Wild's spine as he sang:

"It's behind me, right?"

Underseen asked:

"What the heck is that?"

Block echoed:

"What the heck is that?"

Jack sang, as he gestured to the MP3 monster:

"Check out that mook
In the starry night sky."

SuperNate sang:

"Gimme a sec,
To wipe the sleep from my eye."

Jack decided to sing a description:

"It's oohy, ooky and flat!"

Then mother and son sang in a duo:

"What the heck is that?"

Then Horse noticed something:

"Hey, wait! Does something feel quite wrong?"

SuperNate declared:

"By Jove, we're all breaking into song!"

Gaz stated:

"Now that you pointed it out --"

Alic announced:

"We are crooning no doubt!"

Jack added:

"And we can't help but sing along."

Underseen asked:

"What the heck is that?"

Horse echoed:

"What the heck is that?"

Blue decided:

"I'm goin' to guess it's coz of that creepy thing!["

Cloak sang:

"Someway, somehow, that thing is making us -- "

Then all RAFians sang a sour note:

"Sing!"

The MP3 monster blasted a green energy beam at the assembled RAFians.  They naturally scrambled, and Jack observed:

"This thing gets madder and madder
If you hit a note that is flat."

Then they all sang the final lyric before they headed for cover:

"What the heck is that?"

The MP3 monster roared and flew over, as the RAFians hunkered down.

[Cloak]

New page.

• Book XXVI: Outage Outrage

The RAFians find themselves losing their powers.

• Book XXVII: Infinity and Eternity

The Infinity Gems and the Eternity Stones make themselves known.

• Book XXVIII: The Virus Rings

The RAFians are attacked by foes they never thought they'd see again.

• Book XXIX: Soul-Suckers

The RAFians are attacked by Dementors, which have a rather large effect on Cloak.

• Book XXX: Mayhem of the Music Miser

Cloak recalls the RAFians' previous confrontation with the Music Miser three years ago.

• Book XXXI: The Metal-Maker

The RAFians must save their own from a Roboticizer.

• Book XXXII: Richard is Missing

The RAFians must cope without Richard.

• Book XXXIII: Emotional Food

The RAFians must confront a different kind of vampire.

• Book XXXIV: Transformation Confrontation

The RAFians must confront some strange machines.

• Book XXXV: Richard's Horn

The RAFians must get Richard's Horn, a mystical musical instrument, back from Malice, who received it from a RAFian traitor.

• Book XXXVI: Feral Scream

A Wildwethel-centric book, he must deal with his feral side.

• Book XXXVII: Predators and Prey

The RAFians are being preyed upon by some sentient predators.

• Book XXXVIII: A Protean Problem

The RAFians must deal with a powerful snot-nosed kid who, quite literally, can do whatever he wants.

• Book XXXIX: The Horsemen

Four RAFians are captured and converted into four Horsemen of the ancient, rogue Realm Walker Cataclysm.

• Book XL: Sizeable Pain in the Necks

The RAFians must deal with Heinlein aliens.

• Book XLI: RAF's Nightmare

The RAFians must survive their own nightmares.

• Book XLII: Unlucky Charms

The RAFians must contend with a rather bloodthirsty leprechaun.

• Book XLIII: The Piper

The RAFians must contend with a pied piper.

• Book XLIV: Starlight Desire

The RAFians race Malice, Abomination, and the Banned to a wishing star (no, not Estelore).

• Book XLV: A War of Armor

Parker is outraged to see knockoffs of his rather unique armor and what they're being used for.

• Book XLVI: The Worst Plague

The RAFians must weather the worst plague to ever existed -- the Hate Plague.

• Book XLVII: Little Alien Napoleons

The RAFians are caught in the middle of a war between Helmacrons and Fmeks.

• Book XLVIII: Go Away!

The RAFians must deal with the paparazzi who are all of a sudden interested in them.

• Book XLIX: RAFian Tales

RAFians tell various RAFian-themed stories across a lunch table.

• Book L: Maul

The RAFians must deal with the result of one of Demos's experiments.

• Book LI: Erised Orbs

The RAFians must face their greatest desires.

• Book LII: RAFians Alive!

Read the "Mummies Alive" parody in the RAFize songs thread.

• Book LIII: The Pain Reliever

The RAFians must deal with an elderly Vulcan styling himself the "Pain Reliever".

• Book LIV: Beyond the Veils

Aquilai and Aila must confront old foes while the other RAFians must put up with a Czarinian bounty hunter.

• Book LV: Dangerous Deals

Demos meets up with his half-brother, Shenecron, who has a perchant for making deals.

• Book LVI: Of One Mind

Malice seeks out the Unimind.

• Book LVII: The End of Time

The RAFians must contend with two Kryptonians (who think they're Time Lords) and prevent them from ending time altogether.

• Book LVIII: Hematomimic

The RAFians must capture a Plasmavore and put up with it's rather stupid Judoon jailer.

• Book LIX: Sins of Youth

Estelore, Richard, Parker, and Cloak must survive when the entire city and forum have been reduced to two-year-olds.

• Book LX: The Replacements

The RAFians must contend with the fame-feeding Eidolon Consciousness.

• Book LXI: Arachnoids

The RAFians must contend with the Arachnoids and finding a cure for one of their own that was poisoned before it's too late.

• Book LXII: Personal Tissues

The RAFians must contend with some one misusing Bibliophaetos's discarded book shell.

• Book LXIII: Memory Today, Gone Tomorrow

The RAFians lose their memory and must find a way to regain it.

• Book LXIV: Appliance Armageddon

A superintelligent computer controls all electronics, and the RAFians must stop it.

• Book LXV: Prodigy and Composite

Some RAFians are merged into two separate entities.

• Book LXVI: The Merging

The Universes begin colliding and merging.

• Book LXVII: Be A Doll

The RAFians are confronted by a Super Chucky.

• Book LXVIII: They're Such Cards

The RAFians are sealed into cards, which end up trapped in an ancient leather-bound book, and it's up to three kids to free them.  An out-of-continuity book.

• Book LXIX: Dinosaur Island

Everyone, except those that bear a Mark, begin turning saurian.

• Book LXX: Corrupted

The RAFians must deal with the son of Cataclysm, Corruptor.

• Book LXXI: Artificial Skins

The RAFians must deal with symbiotes.

• Book LXXII: Separation Anxiety

The RAFians must contend with an ethereal virus.

• Book LXXIII: A Thing About RAFians

The RAFians must contend with Seekers, which home in onto their Marks.

• Book LXXIV: A Planted Idea

The RAFians must contend with a floramaniac.

• Book LXXV: Vacation Photos

The RAFians are sucked into a Polarisoid camera.

• Book LXXVI: A Personal Gremlin

The RAFians must contend with gremlins.

• Book LXXVII: The Rust is Silence

The Rafians must deal with an oxidation ray wielded by a criminal.

• Book LXXVIII: The Toyman Cometh

The RAFians deal with a Toyman-esque character.

• Book LXXIX: RAFian Idol

Yes, just another excuse to put in more of the (as of writing) nearly 800 parodies.

• Book LXXX: Savage Heart

Cloak battles an ancient being called Garrotik.

• Book LXXXI: Slave Islands and Juggernauts

Three RAFians are taken prisoners by the Knights and sold into the slavery of New Genoshia, while the others deal with a juggernaut.

• Book LXXXII: Shredding a King

The RAFians deal with a demonic Shredder-like ghost called Regiphaetos.

• Book LXXXIII: RAF -- The TV Show

The RAFians are forcibly recruited to Mojo's programs.

• Book LXXXIV: The Drinker

The RAFians must contend with a Spirit-Drinker.

• Book LXXXV: The Last Laugh

The RAFians must face Joker Gas.

• Book LXXXVI: It's A Mad, Mad, Mad Villain

The RAFians must contend with mind control cards which are ineffective on them.

• Book LXXXVII: Sight Unseen

Six RAFians are rendered functionally blind, optically-speaking.

• Book LXXXVIII: Don't Let It Snow

The RAFians must face a second Ice Age caused by a Diznee Ice Ifrit.

• Book LXXXIX: The Rachel Toxin

The RAFians must find a cure to a toxin that increases the fearlessness, hostility and aggressiveness induced in people which the Mark cannot protect the RAFians from.

• Book XC: Virus Alert!

The RAFians face a dangerous virus seeking a host.

• Book XCI: A Youthful Thief

The RAFians face a creature that siphons off the youth in its victims, provided they're younger than him.

• Book XCII: Calendar Creep

The RAFians face the Calendar Creep, a criminal whose crimes are holiday themed.

• Book XCIII: The Branding

Faerie fights a witch-boy named Salem (and his magical black cat, Saberhagen) for a magical branding iron in Faerie's possession.

• Book XCIV: The Void Zone

Nothing like a "Subspace Emissary" parody.  Sorry.

• Book XCV: An Epic Yarn

The RAFians' world is turned into yarn and fabric.

• Book XCVI: RAFian Gladiators

RAFians are kidnapped by Gamesmaster, another rogue Realm Walker, and force to participate in gladiatorial games.

• Book XCVII: The Box

The RAFians must cage thirteen Revenants released from Pandora's Box -- each representing and amplifying a particular feeling (i.e. hatred), while looking for the perfect host.

• Book XCVIII: From the Shadows

The RAFians must save their shadows and the shadows of everyone else from being absorbed (eaten) by the Umbraraptors, but not everything is what it seems.

• Book XCIX: Grimm Prospects

The RAFians discover Malice controlling several "wesen" with control collars akin to April's in "Catwoman from Channel Six" and get stuck in one-on-one battles to the death with them.  One will die.

• Book C: Loop-De-Loop

Everyone's trapped in a temporal loop, but the only ones that realize it are Cloak, Aila, and Aquilai.

• Book CI: Get 'Em, Shaw

The RAFians face a creature native to the planet Gossamer, who's under the control of Malice.

• Book CII: Threadfall

The RAFians must exterminate an epidemic of Thread.

• Book CIII: Siren's Song

The RAFians must deal with a siren and her alluring song.

• Book CIV: Resistance is Futile

The RAFians must deal with a hybridization of the Borg and the Hive chips (Ben 10: Alien Swarm) -- which the Mark cannot protect them from, nor the Unity energy can destroy.

• Book CV: The Titan

The RAFians must contend with the Titan serum and its effects.

• Book CVI: A Stony Glare

The RAFians must deal with a hungry Stone-Biter and a petrifying venom of a Diznee Stone Ifrit.

• Book CVII: Spritely Pests

The RAFians must deal with irritating sprites, which Faerie has had some rather tenuous experiences with.

• Book CVIII: Destroy All . . . What?

The RAFians must contend with a Furon incursion, and it turns out the Nyacs have knowledge of Furons. . . .

• Book CIX: Going Backwards

A grievious malfunction in Aquilai's TARDIS causes time to reverse its flow and flow backwards.

• Book CX: Death Takes A Holiday

The RAFians must convince Death to take up his role again.  A RAFian will die in this book, and it is within the continuity.

• Book CXI: High Price Stakes

Shanker and Gaz must flee and elude Daphne, the vampire hunter.

• Book CXII: A Killer Housing Market

The RAFians must survive and either destroy or escape a killer house.

• Book CXIII: A Silenced World

The RAFians must cope with a world that has become muted and a young sorceress, Melissa Spellman.

• Book CXIV: The Bureau

The RAFians must save their own from the insideous Bureau of Lost.

• Book CXV: To Tell the Truth

Broken's apprentice, Melissa, accidentally casts a spell forcing everyone to tell the truth.

• Book CXVI: Skin Crawlers

The RAFians, repulsed and revolted, must contend with Hundred (who eventually becomes Thousand, then becomes Million, then Billion, and then, finally, Trillion).

• Book CXVII: School of Stepford Lies

The RAFians must save the children from a school that turns them into Stepford students at Terenia's school.

• Book CXVIII: Ol' Salty

The RAFians must deal with the Salt Man.

• Book CXIX: The Great Race

The RAFians hold a race that Aloth cons himself into.  Who will win?

• Book CXX: Ape Escape

The RAFians must help super intelligent apes -- Caesar the chimp, Brutus the gorilla, and Maestro the orangutan -- reconcil their misanthropy.

• Book CXXI: A Different Kind of Unity

The RAFians must contend with a parasitic "unity".

• Book CXXII: The Great Brain Robery

Someone is stealing brains for an unknown purpose.

• Book CXXIII: The Bounty Hunter

The Knights, in their hypocricy, hire a Tsul'Kalu bounty hunter to collect select RAFians (to taxidermy).

• Book CXXIV: New Controllers

The RAFians confront Zirconians.

• Book CXXV: Creeping Crystal

A wave of crystallizing energy is sweeping the land. . . .

• Book CXXVI: The Element Feeder

The RAFians deal with a creature who feeds on a specific element and matures to a different element each time as it matures. . . .

• Book CXXVII: The Rider and the Walker

The RAFians come up against the Ghost Rider.

• Book CXXVIII: Headhunters

What will happen when RAFians lose their heads?  Seriously.

• Book CXXIX: The Color Purple, Man!

The RAFians confront the Purple Man, who manages to turn the entire government against them . . .

• Book CXXX: The Nemetrix Beetle

The RAFians confront the Black Beetle with Nemetrix properties.

• Book CXXXI: It's Tought to Be A Mod

The members of a primitive forum declare Demos and Blue to be mods. . . .

• Book CXXXII: Who-Zilla?

An energy reaction begins turning RAFians into monstrous creatures in 3XXX.  Out-of-continuity book.

• Book CXXXIII: Well, Techadon-ally . . .

The RAFians confront Techadons who assign them qualitive quatilities, and refuse to acknowledge any defeats.

• Book CXXXIV: The Mind's Eye

The RAFians face Spellbinder and his realistic illusions.

• Book CXXXV: Bas-ic Instincts

Bas awakens and attempts to take control of Cloak and other felines.

• Book CXXXVI: Midas Duck

The RAFians must contend with a very strange golden idol and a greedy sneak-thief.

• Book CXXXVII: War with the Warworlds

The RAFians must defeat two heavily-armed Warworlds.

• Book CXXXVIII: Solar Sucks

The RAFians must save Estelore from a device able to suck out her stellar substance and lifeforce.

• Book CXXXIX: Hounded

The RAFians are attacked by hellhounds that only Demos can see, although Cloak can "see" them via Earthsight.

• Book CXL: Politics

The RAFians, much to Cloak's chagrin and irritation, get caught up in the middle of Realm Walker politics.

• Book CXLI: Buggy Afternoon

A Bug is after Parker's blood, to "avenge" their brother slain by the SPARTAN.

• Book CXLII: Cloak's Nightmare

Cloak has an exceedingly vivid nightmare of the Great RAFian Purge. . . .

• *Book CXLII: Cloak and the Olympians

Cloak confronts and defies the Olympians.

[Cloak]

Now a second chapter today . . .

CHAPTER THREE:
Everybody Must Sing

After a few minutes, the RAFians began to poke their heads out of their hiding places.  Jess sang:

"Oh dear!"

Yarin concurred:

"This is weird!"

Underseen accidentally shapeshifted a rather opulent and copious beard.

"Hey!  I have a beard."

Shorty lamented:

"My MP3 player grew to huge-ocity!
It's an up-in-the-air monstrocity!"

Marie looked at Shorty strangely and sang:

"What did Shorty say?
And why did he say it in that way?"

Shorty still lamented his MP3 player:

"I cannot make it obey!"

Marie commented on the singing:

"This feels, to me, creepy and wrong!"

Shorty addressed Marie, asking sincerely:

"To be suddenly speaking in song?"

Yarin, in a sudden change of tempo, declared:

"Wait!  I think I can explain!"

Rotiart replied:

"It could be extremely lame."

Yarin snarled in song:

"Do you mind?!  This is science!"

Rotiart replied randomly.

"It's a kinda weird appliance."

Yarin, shoving Rotiart aside, sang:

"Yes!  Take my experimental power cell -- "

Shorty saw fit to add:

"Add that laser's evil spell --"

Yarin added:

"Plus Shorty's MP3 player . . ."

Cloak finished:

"The combo that makes this musical slayer!"

Then Cloak and Yarin sang together:

"Now, everybody sing!
Everybody sing!
Everybody has to sing!
You don't have a choice
But to modulate your voice!
Because everybody must sing!"

RAFians sang:

"Sing, sing, sing, sing, sing."

Yarin though aloud in song:

"RAF is caught in an energy bubble."

Cloak observed:

"It's a melodorous sort of trouble."

Yarin elaborated:

"Like Broadway
But involuntary."

Cloak raised an eyebrow and sang:

"Don't need a rhyming dictionary?"

Yarin, ignoring that, pressed:

"This is rather key."

Cloak added:

"The last thing you will see."

Yarin continued:

"This crazed talent judge --"

Cloak finished:

"Who evidently holds a grudge."

Then the two sang together:

"Now, everybody sing!
Everybody sing!
Everybody has to sing!
You don't have a choice
So raise your pretty voice!
Because everybody must sing!"

Again, the RAFians sang:

"Sing, sing, sing, sing, sing!
Sing, sing, sing, sing, sing!"

Cloak sang urgently:

"We have to think fast!"

Yarin added:

"Before the energy blast -- "

Too late, as the monster blasted the green energy at them.

While Yarin dodged out of the way, Cloak however managed to funnel it into his left index and middle fingers.  He forced it down his arm, down to his stomach, cross his stomach, up to his right arm, and out his opposite index and middle fingers, functionally redirecting it.

The blast hit the machine, and it fell . . . crushing Aquilai's TARDIS, causing it to vanish into nothingness.  The green dome vanished immediately, without a second thought.

"MY TARDIS!!" Aquilai roared furiously.  "CLOAK . . . Cloak, I swear I'll . . . I'll . . ."

"Get another one." Cloak said, as Aquilai roared in frustration.  Meanwhile, RAF was preparing for school letting out the next day. . . .

[Underseen]

This is very funny

[Cloak]

Eh, it wasn't really intended to be funny yet.  But oh, well.

More chapters will come tomorrow, though.  I just am not up to posting another.

[Underseen]

2 long song chapters can never be wrong.

[Aquilai]

Finally got round to reading The First Master and it's really good ^^ Fresh change from RAF and the use of zodiacs was really interesting too because they've been around since ancient times. Very well linked together with all the references. I was going to PM you earlier about the Prodigy/Progeny naming but thought I'd read on in case someone else mentioned it (started reading late) instead and Dino (as expected ^^) had . Not that that bit really mattered in the long run. One of your bests I would say. Well done!

[Cloak]

Thanks, Aquilai.  Of course, IRL I may have an ancestor that was really like that but I really don't know.  I really know about much before either of my grandparents.

Anyway, I'll try to get you more chapters today to hold you until Monday. . . .

First chapter of the day.

CHAPTER FOUR:
RAFians Being RAFians

It was the next day, Aquilai was still rather surly, and not even talking to Cloak.  Whereas schools were letting out for summer, and Genies was rather excited about this, singing:

"The bell rings.
School’s done.
Time for eight straight weeks
Of sun and fun!"

Noelle echoed this sentiment:

"No shirt,
No shoes."

Sakki, who was whaling on a particularly ugly troll, sang:

"Beating trolls up,
Anytime I choose."

Marie sighed contentedly before singing:

 

"The beach,
The mall!"

SuperNate stroked his chin thoughtfully as he sang:

"Maybe visit the Tahj Mahal!"

Genies sang:

"You can do the things
That the Mallorians forbid."

Blue sang, with boyish innocence:

"Like streak?"

Genies, ignoring Blue, continued:

"Summer’s not a bummer,
‘Cause we’re RAFians being RAFians."

Brad elated:

"It’s time!
It’s here!"

Brad and Faerie sang together:

"Our very favorite time of year!"

Brad sang happily:

"No school!
Just play!"

Faerie added:

"Being crazy the entire day!"

Brad sang, thoughfully:

"Are you really sure this is allowed?"

Malice, who was hidden by the trees just outside RAF, was listening and sang to Abomination:

"We should help them be destructive and loud."

RAFians sang in chorus:

"‘Cause of RAFians just being RAFians.
Running wild and running free!
RAFians just being RAFians."

Parker, armed with a TP cannon, yelled, "Who can I TP?!"

RAFians, ignoring this continued:

"RAFians just being RAFians.
Close your eyes,
And count to three."

Meanwhile, over in the city, the Knights fretted through song:

"There’s nowhere safe for you or me!
With those RAFians just being RAFians."

A closeted Knight, a female, sang:

"My house!
My hair!"

Then another closeted Knight, this time a militarial male, sang:

"Who bought these rockets
With my credit card?"

The answer was Demos.

The Knights continued to lament:

"My Porsche!
My word!"

Terenia, meanwhile, retorted:

"It’s not my problem
Until September 3rd!"

The city's mayor cried out in song:

"My town!
Might there be something
Goin’ down?"

A mob sang:

"They can do the things that we forbid,
Like freaks!
The problems of the summer
Are caused from RAFians just being RAFians.
RAFians just being RAFians.
Wreaking things and ruining stuff.
RAFians just being RAFians."

Malice's voice managed to carry down into the forum:

"Are you sure that this is enough?"

Genies declared, "No!"

The mob sang rather hostilely:

"RAFians just being RAFians.
Takin’ risks, we must stand tough,
And save our kids from all this stuff!
From RAFians just being RAFians!"

Of course, during the course of the song, no one noticed how the sky took on a green hue or the fact that the MP3 monster and Aquilai's TARDIS had appeared during the duration of the song number, then vanishing yet again. . . .

[Cloak]

Now another chapter -- you know, I'm not cranking these chapters as fast as I intially thought I would.

CHAPTER FIVE:
Get Cathy

In RAF, Terenia was cracking a whip and using a chair to keep some rather rabid newbies and the city's children (all strung out on a sugar high) at bay, saying, "This isn't supposed to be my problem until September 3rd!!"
 
Meanwhile, in lieu of this craziness, which Malice and Abomination helped rather quietly to get out of hand, led to a commercial appearing on the television -- again no one seemed aware of the MP3 monster and Aquilai's TARDIS's second momentary reappearance -- and it featured a performer known as Cathy Daniels, wearing rather ludicrous polka-dotted pants.  She sang:

"You’re sitting there, complaining
About all that you’ve been through.
With the whole summer remaining,
You must be askin’ who
Can protect your darlings
From the bad things that you abhor.
Let me tell ya,
Cathy’s the gal you’re lookin’ for!
Before they skin their knees,
Before they’re black-and-blue,
Before they’ve got TV,
Or keep annoying you!
Before they break their necks,
Before they break their arms,
Before all utter wrecks,
Before they do more harm!"

Then a group of backup singers and dancers sang as they danced around Cathy:

"Flap-flap-flap-flap-flap-flapppity-do!
Cathy is the clown for you!
Flap-flap-flap-flap-flap-flappity-di!
She's the clown for you and I!
Flap-flap-flap-flap-flap-flappity-oh!
Cathy is the way to go!"

Underseen immediately stood up, looking thoroughly upset:

"You hear what I’m hearing?
No, this can’t be true!
That CLOWN is about to take away summer,
For me and you!"

Parker asked:

"No more post slingshots?"

Demos asked, aghast:

"No more forum runs?"

Underseen answered through song:

"No!
If we don’t act now,
We’ll be trapped in Camp Tortureium.
Before she steals our summer,
Before it’s check and mate,
We’ve gotta stop that Cathy,
Before it’s way too late!"

Meanwhile, Cathy continued her ad:

"Why sit here just complaining?
Why even take the chance?
Leave your RAFies with the chap
Who wears the polka-dotted pants!
I know that it seems harsh – "

The RAFians sang loudly:

"It is!"

Cathy added:

"And a little bit unfair."

The RAFians concurred:

"You’re right!"

Cathy rounded out her pitch:

"But someone’s got to be there,
When you know you can’t be there!
It might be a tad expensive,
But let me ask of you,
Won’t it cost more down the line,
When the cops are blaming you?
When the injures incurred while
The RAFians wreck the town,
You can learn to love your cellmate,
Or just learn to love this clown!!
Get Caaaaaaaaaaaaaathy.
Get Caaaaaaaaaaaaaathy.
Get Caaaaaaaaaaaaaathy."

And, as the MP3 monster and the TARDIS vanished again, the RAFians shouted, "Get Cathy!" -- but it was just an idle, empty threat.  In the end, they decided that it was just the flow of the music and song that got to them. . . . However, they did not know that Malice and Abomination were in the Bannedlands. . . .

[Cloak]

Dunno if this'll be the last one today.

CHAPTER SIX:
RAFians Ruin Everything

Meanwhile, in the Bannedlands, Malice and Abomination remained in the shadows.  Abomination was somewhat clumsy and klutzy at this.  The entire lot of them did not notice the sky becoming green or the low, disoriented moan of the MP3 monster.  Either people were being entirely too oblivious, or they did not care.

Malice, however, paid no nevermind at this, and spoke to Queen, "You know, Queen, all your misery has one common denominator: RAFians."

Queen, who apparently did not recognize Malice's voice, answered with a question, "Wait a minute . . . whaddya mean 'RAFians'?"

Malice, in response, sang:

"Who shuts the chats early?
Who bans you for making RAF barren and stark?"

Queen chimed in:

"Yeah!  Who gets all mad and surly,
When you make snarky, snide remarks?
Who do we have to hide from?
From RAF to Bejing?
They’re takin’ away our internet.
RAFians ruin everything!"

Her trollish minions sang, between every line of Queen's:

"RAFians ruin everything!"

Queen sang:

"With all their rules and lies!
It looks like that because –
Time and time again.
It’s an honor to be Banned!"

Aloth announced, after the troll chorus shut up:

"I’d feed the whole world broccoli ice cream!"

A troll that resembled Laura Mallory very much sang:

"I’d censor the mall!"

Yorick, aiming a weapon, sang:

"I’d melt stuff with my heat beam."

Malice, still unseen, sang:

"Too bad it’s not your call."

Queen sang, revealing a scepter with an orb containing two "Fairly Oddparents"-style fairies:

"But I’ve captured two magic fairies.
Waiting to be twisted and twirled.
RAFians couldn’t ruin everything
If we ruled the world."

The troll chorus began their schtick again as Queen sang:

"But we’d run things right.
But we know we can fight!
That’s how this day unfurled.
That won’t happen
If I make that we rule the world!
We would make it right.
But we know that we can fight!
That’s how this day unfurled.
That won’t happen
If I make that we rule the world!"

Then the trollish chorus shut up again, as Queen continued:

"Who gets to make the rules?"

The trolls yelled, "Us!", then Queen continued:

"We’re all perfect,
And we have no flaws!
Who gets to run the country?"

The trolls declared "Us!" again.

Then Queen inquired:

"Who gets to say what’s cool?"

The trolls cheered "Us!" again.  Then Queen concluded:

"To be perfectly blunt,
It is us that rule!"

"Excellent," Malice said, with a low chuckle, as the land around started changing around them as the MP3 monster vanished again.  Queen was using the fairies magic to reimagine the world.  Reimagine it into one where RAFians are fugitives, and the Banned are the dictorial government.

[Cloak]

Probably will be the last today.

CHAPTER SEVEN:
Banned and In Charge

The world was now a dystopian mess of world, so much so, that the sky was already green when the MP3 monster blipped back into existence.  RAFians were either arrested, imprisoned, fugitives, or dead.  Queen was the head honcho, with Yorick and Aloth as her generals . . . but Queen explains it best when she gloats through song:

"That Banned had no power,
I had to correct.
We Banned are the boss now,
So, you can expect
That things will be different
With me at the wheel!
I’m Banned and in charge now,
And here is what I feel!
I made a place that the Banned are now running.
The view from this treehouse is really quite stunning."

Meanwhile, Malice and Abomination were watching it with amused smiles, as Malice sang:

"My plan, oh look, it’s working,"

Abomination added:

"You’re really quite cunning."

Ignoring that, Malice sang:

"Off to Monger we go!"

Just before they Walked away, Abomination said, "Nice cloak," which fell on deaf ears.
 
Back at Queen's citadel palace, Queen was singing:

"It’s revenge for breakfast,
And vengeance for lunch.
It’s retribution for dinner,
And I have a hunch,
With the way things are run,
We don’t act like a mob,
There’s plenty do
And we’ve all got a job!"

She handed the smallest and scrawniest troll a badge as she announced:

"You get to be the police chief."

To which he replied in song:

"Can I flash the big red light?"

Queen acquiesced rather irritably with an "all right", and turning to Yorick:

"You go to the RAF forum,
And break everything in sight!"

Yorick declared, "At last!"

Queen sang more, pointing to a troll:

"You get to lead my armies
All over the map."

Then she pointed to a magically-chained Brad:

"And you clean my room,"

Then she pointed to a similiarly-bound Faerie:

"And you clean my clothes,
While I stay here and nap!"

***

Meanwhile, in the Nexus, the two Realm Walkers rapped:

"We’re sickies*,
We’re sickies,
Check out our mad, wicked mixies."

Malice rapped solo:

"Have you checked out Cloak's adopted planet?"

Abomination added:

"We know that you didn’t plan it."

Malice continued:

"But the Banned have the power and a Realm Walker."

Monger, a militaristic, warmongering (hence part of his name), bellicist gorilla-form Realm Walker, sat before their performance.  He recognized the two, but he couldn't quite see a way that he could use as an excuse to go to war.  He spat:

"Dagnabbit."

Malice and Abomination sang:

"We’re sickies,
We’re sickies.
And we’re about to unfix these.
Here’s your notice of eviction!"

Monger, offended and disgruntled, snarled:

"This is my jurisdiction."

Malice sang, rather persuadingly:

"The power balance needs a-fixin’."

Abomination added:

"Like a magical prediction."

Then they two rapped:

"We’re sickies,
We’re sickies.
And if you open up “Da Rules”, see,"

Malice said:

"It’s Section R."

Abomination clarified:

"Subsection A."

Malice clarified further:

"Amendment F."

Then both rapped:

"A loophole, we say!"

Malice continued:

"Which means we can make the world
What we desire!"

"Was the rapping really necessary?" Monger asked.  The fact that he wasn't turning the two in was a rather treasonous act in and of itself.  But Monger lived for war -- which had never happened in his lifetime.

***

Back in the Prime Universe, Queen was surveying her lands.  She sang:

"Everything’s going tremendous.
I finally have the reins!
Hot guys are bringing me pizzas.
And Cloaky’s in tylee chains!
Teachers have homework,
And bullies babysit!
I make the rules,
And I call the shots!"

Faerie snarled in song:

"To this, I will not submit!
She thinks things are running quite smoothly,
Though she ignores starting twenty-seven wars!"

Brad added:

"And I don’t think it’s groovy,
That we’re stuck with all the chores!"

Queen chided the two:

"How can you be disapproving?
This gets better by the hour!
No worries, no strife.
My, this is the life!"

Monger appeared, with Cloak in hand, still bound in tylee chains.  He turned to Queen and said coldly, "You have too much power."

Then he takes Cloaky and Walks away.

Queen shrugged, and said, in an off-hand way, "Crud."  Back in the Nexus, Monger drops Cloak atop his desk angrily, unaware that the chains had loosened considerably in transit.

[Underseen]

Shamelessly parodying the fairly odd parents movie eh? One of my favorite cartoon musical TV movies... and yes I have a list for that.

[Cloak]

*Sudden image of Underseen, dressed as Stewie Griffin, singing, "I've Got A Little List".*

Anyway, the second book was a shameless parody of the "My Little Pony Movie", which was on a VHS tape after some 80s Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle episodes (I was into TMNT, Dagger was into "My Little Pony").

Anyway, as I've already said in "Totally Random Thoughts", I had a bit of an issue last night, so I don't know if I can get anymore chapters up today, though I'll give it a shot. . . .

Well, how about this?  Okay, it may be a bit of a lazy chapter -- but cut me a break.  I didn't get much sleep last night.

CHAPTER EIGHT:
We're Sickies

Meanwhile, back in the Prime Universe, Malice and Abomination were gloating . . . through rap, as the MP3 monster, looking forlorn reappeared and the sky became green again.

"Yeah.
We’re sickies.
Yeah.
We’re sickies.
We’re sickies.
Check out our mad, wicked mixies.
We got glowin' heads, large pointed hoods, saps.
Clean out your ears, and hear our rap."

Then Abomination rapped solo:

"Yo, M, yo!
You’re in charge."

Malice rapped rather haphazardly:

"I may look strange,
But my goals are large!
I’m not a hater,
But I must cater
To my mission
To become the something-rator."

Abomination continued solo:

"I’m Doomsday, son,
I’m anti-fun.
And all those RAFians
Can bite my bun!
But my darling's is gonna be
The big-time ruler, see?"

Malice replied in rap:

"You got that, I see."

Then they rapped again together.

"We’re sickies.
We’re sickies.
And the climate is in the sixties.
We’ve manipulated that CLOWN to be our tool,
To beat the RAFians, so we could rule!
We’re sickies.
We’re sickies.
It’s goin’ exactly as we predict-ies.
We can’t stop now,
The time is near.
Where the Nexus and RAF here,
Are ruled by us, you hear?
By sickies.
By sickies.
We’re sickies.
Strong like Bill Bixby.
We’re sickies.
Yeah.
We’re sickies.
Yeah.
We’re sickies."

Meanwhile, a small lizard scurried away unnoticed.  No one noticed the small, stylized "R" on his right forefoot nor that the MP3 monster vanished again with Aquilai's TARDIS. . . .

[Cloak]

Still tired.  Sorry if this chapter sucks because of it.

CHAPTER NINE:
Pull Back the Realm Walkers

Meanwhile, back in the Nexus, Cloak was freed from his chains rather unceremoniously.  He never did like monger, with his lust for battle and blood.
 
"Oof!" Cloak uttered as he landed hard on his rear end.  Then he stood up, and demanded, "What do you want, Monger?"
 
"I know that you’re upset, and also on fire." Monger said, with a thick voice.

Cloaky looks down and notices his cloak caught fire.  He irritatedly snaps his fingers and the fire is extinguished.

Monger continued, "But let me explain something to you."
 
Suddenly, polka music started up.
 
"Oh no." Cloak said, hand over his face.  "Not the polka."

"With my muscles
I will tussles,
With those who dare discuss-ills.
I live for reprisals
For those that challenge my authority.
With my knuckles,
You will buckles,
Like a chicken, you will cluck-ills.
For I love “Da Rules”,
And I know “Da Rules” love me!
You will learn to fear my mighty fist,
If this polka won’t help you get the gist.
And all you fools might disagree
But you will all answer to me!"

There was a brief pause musically, as Monger sent a wave of camouflage brown and green energy out in all directions.  It was a showy technique with no effectiveness at all.  Monger's attire was very different from the average Realm Walker.  He wore camouflauge cargo pants, combat boots, a cloak, and he eschewed any shirt ever given to him.
 
He continued:

"With this polka,
I won’t choke-a.
But first this delish mocha!
Mmm!
I was shocked when I awoke-a,
To a world where Banned and trolls all ruled.
With my biceps
I must try-ceps
To see that the Banned are now the nice-ceps.
The energy for your plans
Has just been retooled.
Oh, I love to get to draw that line,
And this moron makes me all the time."

Cloak looked thoroughly offended, but said nothing.  He did not know how far Monger's authority extended.  The fact that he loved rules was pretty much just for show, Cloak knew.

"For “Da Rules” are very clear.
Now the time is here.
For . . . me . . . to . . ."

He showed Cloak to a larger, rather comical-looking magnet attached to some strange device.  Monger took out a remote with a large red button from his cargo pants, and pushed it as he sang:

"Pull back the Realm Walkers.
Bring them all home one-by-one.
Pull back the Realm Walkers,
Now that my mocha is done.
Pull back the Realm Walkers.
Now that the Banned has the reins.
Now we’re pulling, pulling, pulling back the Realm Walkers.
So, I can BRING THEM PAIN!"

Suddenly, all Realm Walkers -- except Malice and Abomination strangely enough -- were being drawn from the Realms back into the Nexus.
 
"You cannot have had the authority to do this," Cloak said.

[Cloak]

Okay -- a little change of pace, no song in this chapter!  So . . . may be a little short.

CHAPTER TEN:
Trouble Monger

"As a matter of fact, 'Cloak', I --" Monger said, jeering at Cloak's chosen name.

"Do not." came a rather hard voice.

Cloak and Monger looked around, and saw five figures coming towards them in rather ornate robes, all wearing cloaks, although their hoods were down.  Apparently, there was an election since Cloak was gone, as the faces were newer and younger than the ones that he saw before.

A male dragon Walker in red robes, a female phoenix Walker in pink robes, a male shark Walker in blue robes, a female smilodon Walker in yellow robes, and a male snake Walker in black robes.  The hard voice that had spoke belonged to the dragon Realm Walker.

"What?!" Monger roared angrily.

"You do not have the authority to pull all the Realm Walkers back to the Nexus," the phoenix Councilor spoke.

"Who are you to determine what my authority --"

"We are the Council, Monger!" the shark Councilor snarled.  "You will do better to remember that!"

Cloak was glad to see that the old codgers that previously resided as the Council were no longer in possession of the offices they so arduously loved.  But that didn't mean that Cloak trusted these new Councilors any more than he did the others.  They were politicians, after all.

Monger looked nonplussed, as if he never considered that the Council would interfere with him and his goals.  It was a rather shortsighted oversight on his part.

"Councilors, I --"

"Ssssave it," said the snake Councilor, "we are not interessssted in your excussssessss."

"You have overstepped your authority in doing this," said the smilodon Councilor, "a transgression that must be taken seriously and severely."

"Come with us, Monger," said the dragon Councilor imperiously.  "As for the rest of you, you may go.  Lest you want to give testimony against Monger?"

Cloak, repressing vindictive feelings, declined, and, once more, immersed himself back in the Prime Universe.  To his real home.