Author Topic: The Ellimist and me  (Read 1296 times)

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Offline The Spectre

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The Ellimist and me
« on: September 06, 2011, 11:04:33 PM »
Ok, so this story is my first, please try to be kind…
I looked at my hand, I was wearing a green shimmering ring and my  favorite green T-shirt, now displayed the symbol of will, I didn’t knew ho and I didn´t cared, all I knew was that I had been given a chance.

We were all on that ship, Jake, Cassie, Marco, Tobias and …Rachel, this was it, the moment I was there to stop. Jake spoke.
-OK Sam, I must admit that having a green lantern with us has gotten us out of serious problems but it must be Rachel- he continued, but no longer looking at me - yes Rachel, it has to be you, you have to kill Tom-
I had to talk –No Jake-
-What, what do you mean no? - He was startled
-You can´t send her- I answered as calmly as I could 
-Why?-
-She will die if she goes- everybody was staring at me but Jake continued to argue.
-You don´t know that! - His temper was rising, so was his voice
-Yes I do!!-  Now we were both yelling
-No you don’t!!-
-Jake please! It will all happen again!-
-Wha…? Happen again? What do you mean? Like those Sairo rips or whatever? Has this, everything, happened before?-
-Yes, it has, all of this, if you send her she will kill Tom, but she will also die!-
Jake looked concerned, -How do you know that?-
-It is all written, just in, I don’t know, common books, it’s hard to explain, it could be like a universe out of this one, or maybe the future…-
Marco spoke for the first time- Aliens, time travel, morphing and once I´d thought I’ve seen it all, alternate universes, Jesus-
Jake continued -So what?-
-So I was reading these books and when I reached this part, I-I just couldn’t bear it, Rachel dying, it was too much, next think I know I was here-
-How? Was it the Ellimist?-
-I’m not sure, all I know is that I wanted to stop it, I couldn´t let her die because you were a team, and you were all so great and, well, because…-
-Yes?-
-Because I loved her-
Nobody spoke but I am sure that if, hadn’t it been for my ring, Tobias would have morphed into something big and squashed me, Rachel just looked shocked. Jake meditated for a while before talking
 –OK then, you´ll both go, but Sam, just back her up, don’t let her get killed, she must do it-
We ran through the corridors of the pool ship, then we came to a fork in the road, at my will a green map of the ship appeared out of my ring, it told us to go left, we kept walking for a while until we reached the place we were looking for, the place were Rachel died, there was Tom, he morphed the snake and bite Rachel, she bite back, it was now or never, she was demorphing, at any moment the polar bear would appear and kill her, sudden movement behind her! I created a shield between here and the bear, its paw stopped an inch from her, then I fired, my concussive beam hit the bear squarely in the chest, and it was knocked back unconscious…
I turned towards Rachel, - let’s get out of here- I said, we walked back to the bridge to meet with the rest of the Animorphs-Sam? - She asked, I turned around and without warning, she was kissing me, it lasted a few seconds, I wish it would have last forever-Thanks- was the only thing she said.
We reached the others after running for some minutes, we laughed at Marcos dumb jokes, Jake hugged his cousin as though he would never let her go, but then I heard the booming voice inside my head –It´s time to go back- I felt as being jerked by a giant hook into darkness and land with a thump into my bedroom with the Animorphs staring at me with dead eyes from a piece of paper.
For the next few days I didn’t eat, I only slept when I was too tired to cry any longer, I wanted to shout at the heavens, to vomit in blind rage but I didn’t, I resisted for weeks until it was too much for me to bear-Why did you do this to me??!!- I shouted at nobody, but to my surprise someone answered
–It was your purpose- I had already heard that voice before
 -Ellimist?- I asked still to nobody
–Yes- he answered
 –You send me there, and then took me back, why?-
-That was what you wanted, to save the one you loved-
-But I was happy, send me back!!!- I demanded
-I can’t do that; it’s not your purpose-
-So what is your purpose?-
-To live, the rest only you can tell, but don’t worry, you’ll see them again-
-How, when?-
-When you die- he answered
-Knowing this, why shouldn’t I just kill myself now?-
-It’s not your purpose, and if you don’t accomplish your purpose, I needn’t keep my promise-
-I see…-
So I waited and lived, as good as any man can live, and now on my deathbed, many years passed, I close my eyes and drift into darkness….
Light!! I look around, light everywhere, and look at my hand, no longer frail, but powerful, like those I had many years ago 
-Ellimist?-
-Yes-
I laugh – You kept your promise, so what should I do now?-
-I think you already know- from the surrounding light a tunnel opens and at the far end of it, I see two girls and three boys walking out of the mall, I smile.
-Yes, I know-
-You shouldn’t delay, they are waiting for you-
-So, I’m going to be an Animorph?-
-Not precisely-
-So how am I supposed to fight? I don’t have any power…-
- Are you sure? Look closer-
I watch my hand and see an emerald ring I could have sworn wasn’t there before.
-With this war should be much shorter-
-Maybe, still you have eternity to find out-
-Thanks-I say and break into a run to the end of the tunnel…
More light, it makes me close my eyes and when I open them again the Animorphs to-be are staring at me.
-Took you long enough Sam- said Cassie
-Yep, where have you been, shopping for jewelry? - Marco says after noticing my ring
Jake notices it too and asks –Yeah Sam, what’s up with the ring? I´ve never seen you wear it before-
-It´s a long story Jake- I say.
-Well you can tell it on our way home right? - said Tobias, still not a hawk.
We were walking across the construction site when suddenly Tobias stopped. He was pointing. Pointing almost straight up. -Look,- he said.
-What?-said Jake.
-Just look, - Tobias said. His voice was strange. Amazed-sounding, but serious at the same time.
So we looked up. And there it was. A brilliant, blue-white light that scooted across the sky, going fast at first, too fast for it to be an airplane, then slower and slower. -What is it?-
Tobias shook his head. -I don't know.-
I knew what it was of course but held it, Marco and Rachel would have laughed, we figured.
But Cassie just blurted it right out. -It's a flying saucer!-
-Mm, guys?- I interrupted –Maybe as we are of the map of weirdness by this point I should tell you about my ring…-
The Ellimist had kept his promise, and I had eternity to enjoy it…

 What do you think? REVIEW PLEASE!!!



NateSean

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Re: The Ellimist and me
« Reply #1 on: September 07, 2011, 10:51:53 AM »
1: Formatting. Grammar. Look at how the other stories are done on this board. That's generally how yours should look as well.

2: What is going on in this story? Suddenly you're wearing a shirt, you have a ring, and he all ready knows what's going on but we don't know why. Then he's on "that ship" with Jake, Cassie, Marco, Tobias...and Rachel? What ship. Where in the series does this take place? What is going on?

Why does Jake know about the Green Lantern? Why...why? The story leaves me confused and that is not a feeling you want to give your readers.


Offline The Spectre

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Re: The Ellimist and me
« Reply #2 on: September 07, 2011, 08:51:10 PM »
1: Formatting. Grammar. Look at how the other stories are done on this board. That's generally how yours should look as well.

2: What is going on in this story? Suddenly you're wearing a shirt, you have a ring, and he all ready knows what's going on but we don't know why. Then he's on "that ship" with Jake, Cassie, Marco, Tobias...and Rachel? What ship. Where in the series does this take place? What is going on?

Why does Jake know about the Green Lantern? Why...why? The story leaves me confused and that is not a feeling you want to give your readers.
well, sorry abou the confussion, but basically thats the point, not to now at first whats going on, butt as far as i remember (being a lot of time since i finished the series) this should be about book 54 or 55, when rachel kills tom and is killed by a polar bear later, so basically i, or the character who is me reads this, and is torn apart by rachels death, so the ellimist, god, whatever, sees his reaction and allows him to enter the book so to speak and change the course of things (by granting him a gl power ring" , but is later returned to the "real world", then when he/i die, he is basically transported to his own personal version of heaven to redo all the animorphs adventures for eternity, and about the grammar, sorry, english its not my natal language and i do the best i can