Diary of a Mad Guitar Player

[guitarhero01234]

New, short-ish chapter. Same reasons as last time for not posting one sooner; work, real life, trying to maintain friendships, and family drama. Hopefully, some of that is resolved by now.

Chapter 10: Aftermath

gh lay on the ground, motionless, as the chaos subsided. Slowly, he started to tremble. “Damn it . . .” he said eventually, his voice shaking. “God damn it!” gh punched the ground in an almost comically pitiful gesture, as compared to his outburst. He stood up finally and looked at Cloak, tears welling in his eyes. “I let it happen again. . . .”

“gh, what happened, happened,” Cloak said reassringly. There was a silence as gh regained his composure, at least, as much as he could. “Let's go back.”

The two traveled in silence most of the way back to the forum. Obviously, gh's song had drained him both physically and emotionally. Unfortunately, it was a feeling that Cloak knew all too well.

“Cloak,” gh said as the two started to get closer to the forum. “I didn't . . . I swear, I didn't mean to . . .”

Cloak finished the thought for gh. “I know you didn't mean to kill Harrison. gh, I've come to know you well enough to know that you're not a killer.”

“I just lost control, you know?” gh had to fight back tears once again. Clearly, he was shaken. “I gotta control my temper, or else that happens.” Cloak stayed silent. He had figured that this was the case, but it was probably best to let gh talk it out. “I should have just ignored him.”

“You can't blame yourself for this. He was practically asking for you to attack him.” Whether or not Cloak actually believed this was a moot point, as it seemed to calm gh down at least a little bit.

“Thing is,” gh started after a moment, “this isn't the first time this happened.” He took a breath, trying to gather his thoughts. “It was a while ago, before I became a RAFian. I'll tell you some other time. Right now, well, it's a little too . . . I guess painful is the right word.”

Cloak nodded. “I understand, these things take time.” The two arrived outside the forum. It was rather quiet inside, being so late at night. “Are you going to be alright?”

“I think so. I'm just gonna need to be alone for a while, I think.” gh looked at the forum; the place that he had called home for at least a few months now.* Even with the minor spats that he might have with other RAFians, it was easily the only place that he could imagine even feeling welcome in. “Just one thing, Cloak. I don't want the others to know. Not just because they might not trust me because of it, but it's just not who they see me as. Hell, most of them don't even think of me as a fighter. And I'd rather keep it that way.”

“Don't worry, this stays between me and you.”

“Thanks.” The two re-entered the forum and walked toward their threads. “Actually, I have to ask you something else. This whole thing was really stressful, and I just need to calm down. Do you think-”

“No, gh. I'm not giving you your cigarettes back.” For once, gh didn't protest. He simply smiled at Cloak.

“Thanks,” he said once again. “I'll see you, tomorrow, Cloaky.”

*Not sure if I mentioned, but this takes place sometime around the end of Year 1. Obviously, it takes place before Leatherhead transformed, otherwise he would have had a part in this.

[redtailedsaffa]

Consult the local killer-with-a-conscience.

[guitarhero01234]

Unlike Cassie, I'm at least not sanctimonious. I don't think I am, at least.

[redtailedsaffa]

No, that would be me I was referring to. Though maybe not as sanctimonious, yes.

[Cloak]

Ah. The cigarette thing again. You when I first came up with that, I never expected it to become a running gag, but I love that it has.

Excellent chapter, my dear GH.

[guitarhero01234]

Thank you

And really, the only reason I made the cigarettes a running joke was because you seemed to like it so much. And if I could make a sentimental moment out of it, I certainly wasn't going to pass up the opportunity.

[redtailedsaffa]

Or get you to kick the habit.

[guitarhero01234]

HOLY ****, A NEW CHAPTER!? Yeah, I've been lazy. No excuses this time. Maybe I'll actually post the next chapter after this before another month and a half goes by. . . .

Chapter 11: In This Together

In reality, gh didn't quite make good on his promise of seeing Cloak the next day. In fact, he ended up more or less isolating himself in his thread for a good 48 hours or so. The other RAFians didn't think too much of this, considering gh had a tendency to occasionally isolate himself. Nobody was quite sure why, but it could easily be explained as one of his many eccentricities. Most of the RAFians simply assumed that he was writing more of his musical numbers – there was no way that he could come up with all of them on the spot, for sure.

In fact, gh had spent a lot of time stewing over what had happened. The incident with Harrison had brought back a lot of memories from the past couple of years, that frankly, gh would have much rather forgotten. Before he became a RAFian, these dark, miserable thoughts happened much more frequently than he would have liked.

If only he could control this goddamned rage. Granted, he had only let this happen once before, but even that was one time too many. And to make things worse, there was a small, but dangerous part of his brain that enjoyed it. The almost limitless power that came with his anger. While he tried to silence that part of himself, to subdue it as much as possible, it was almost constantly nagging at him, telling him to give in to his rage. And at times, it was very hard to resist.

gh sighed and rolled over in his bed, happening to lock his gaze on his guitar. It was just now that he really noticed the wear on the instrument. Those who are not particularly attached to an instrument would simply dismiss this as a result of playing often, but to musicians, every ding, every spot where the finish was worn was a story with their companion; a metaphorical battle scar. And in gh's case, these were literal battle scars. He'd been through a lot with that thing. Even though he'd only had it for a couple of years, it was practically a part of him at this point. gh essentially considered it another person or entity. Though he would admit that it was a little ridiculous, it wasn't hard to see why, considering how it was practically a part of him.

Suddenly, gh sat up in his bed. Struck with inspiration, he began to scour his thread. Although he devoted most of his energy into his guitar playing, he certainly knew how to play other instruments; bass guitar, drums, keyboards, and he even had a kazoo or two sitting around somewhere. After all, he was first and foremost an artist (and you never know when you'll need a kazoo), preferring making music over simply using it in battle. Of course, he had no qualms about the latter if it was necessary. He finished hooking up all of the gear that he had searched his thread for, and was standing, guitar hanging from his shoulder, in front of an array of drum machines and keyboards. He didn't actually need every piece of gear that he had, but it lent a sense of grandiosity that he felt was important.

Taking a deep breath, he began to play a series of notes on one of the keyboards, then transitioned to a drum machine. Leatherhead, taking notice of gh's actions, began tapping his tail along with the drums, keeping a steady backbeat. After strumming a few chords along with the synthesizers and pounding drum machines, gh began to sing:

I've become unstoppable,
Holding on to when everything seemed to matter more.
The two of us, all used and beaten up.
Watching fate as it flows down the path we have chose.

You and me,
We're in this together now,
None of them can stop us now.
We will make it through somehow.
You and me,
If the world should break in two,
Until the very end of me,
Until the very end of you.

Awake to the sound as they peel apart the skin.
They pick and they pull, trying to get their fingers in.
Well, they gotta kill what we found,
Well, they gotta hate what they fear,
Well, they gotta make it go away,
And they gotta make it disappear.

The further I fall, I'm beside you,
As lost as I get, I will find you,
The deeper the wound, I'm inside you,
Forever and ever, I am a part of . . .

You and me,
We're in this together now,
None of them can stop us now.
We will make it through somehow.
You and me,
If the world should break in two,
Until the very end of me,
Until the very end of you.

All that we were is gone, we have to hold on,
When all our hope is gone, we have to hold on,
All that we were is gone, we have to hold on,
All that we were is gone, BUT WE CAN HOLD ON!

You and me,
We're in this together now,
None of them can stop us now.
We will make it through somehow.
You and me,
Even after everything,
You're the queen and I'm the king,
Nothing else means anything.

gh played a short melody on one of his keyboards, before finally ending self-indulgent jam session. Emotionally exhausted, set his guitar back on its stand and sat on his bed. Despite the draining nature of his song, it was somewhat invigorating at the same time. After all, it served as a reminder that he would still have himself and his guitar, no matter what.

“And the other RAFians,” gh mumbled to himself. True, they often thought of him as something of a ditz, but he honestly wouldn't have it any other way. As long as gh was a RAFian, he would have the others to fall back on, no matter what. Finally, he stood up and opened the door to his thread. He was ready to take on the world.


Source song

Yeah, I know, I only changed one word in the lyrics, but the song fit so well that I really didn't have to change any more. Probably only gonna be another chapter or two before I wrap this thing up. I may or may not do another fic after this; it really depends depends on whether or not I have enough ideas and inspiration to do so.

[Cloak]

I guess Cloak doesn't hold the patent on brooding in his thread.

[redtailedsaffa]

I thought the wording of this chapter sounded like a dark sort of song.

[guitarhero01234]

Yes, I think that bit about the kazoos helped with that

Gonna try to get another chapter posted tonight. No promises

[guitarhero01234]

Final chapter. I would have finished this not too long after the previous one, but I spent the past week trying to think of a song to close this ****storm with. I think I thought of a good one.

Chapter 12: Let the Ceremony Begin

A couple of days later, all the RAFians filed into the auditorium, much like they did weeks before. The air around the forum was filled with uncertainty, as everyone was itching to know exactly what awards would be given to whom. On the way in, gh happened to brush past Cloak, only flashing a wordless smile at the Realm Walker. Once everybody sat down and became comfortable, Phoenix nonchalantly stepped up to the podium.

“Alright. Is this thing on? Can you hear me? Yes? Good.” Phoenex nonchalantly cleared his throat before continuing. “First of all, I'd like to thank you all for coming tonight. I know it's a bit of a hassle, having to get dressed up and all . . .”

“Get on with it!” a nameless RAFian shouted.

“Yes, get on with it!” somebody else yelled. The lurkers seemed to be an impatient bunch.

“Oh, what, I'm not even allowed to give my speech?”

“GET ON WITH IT!” the entire auditorium roared. Well, nearly the entire auditorium. There were a few RAFians that refrained, but the roar was enough to jerk gh from his slumber.

“Are you kidding me!?” Phoenix sighed, resting his forehead in his palm. It was then that Richard stepped up to the podium, leaning into the microphone.

“Get on with it.”

“ALRIGHT! FINE!” Phoenix allowed himself to calm down for a moment, much to the chagrin of the rowdier members of the audience. “First award – AND DON'T INTERRUPT ME – for best superhero and sidekick duo . . .” Phoenix paused while Goom ran onstage, holding a small envelope. “Thank you. Best superhero and sidekick duo goes to . . . Saffa and gh!” The auditorium filled with applause as the two award recipients exchanged a high five.”

“Just remember that you're the sidekick, and we'll be good,” Saffa teased.

“The next award for most likely to have a secret superhero identity . . .”

The award ceremony continued much in the same fashion. There weren't really any upsets (although gh would argue that he certainly isn't the coolest RAFian), and Phoenix read the awards off at a decent pace to avoid aggravating the less patient RAFians.

“And finally, the award you've all been waiting for. I assume so, at least. The votes are in, and you've all decided . . .”

“GET ON WITH-”

“Oh, will you all stop that! Whatever. RAFian of the year goes to . . . Saffa!”

For the final time that night, the auditorium erupted with claps, cheers, slide whistles, cows mooing, and other sounds of congratulation. gh, however, was dumbfounded. “What the actual ****?” he said, loud enough for only him and Saffa to hear.

“What?” Saffa said, a smile plastered across her face.

“I mean, not that you don't deserve it, but honestly, I was expecting Cloak to win. Or Ash.”

On the other side of the auditorium, Broken was very subtly chuckling to himself. That went unnoticed by the others, though, as they seemed to be focused on making as much noise as possible. Saffa's voice could just barely be heard over the ruckus, shouting, “YOU ALL ARE COMPLETELY OFF YOUR ROCKERS!” She high-fived gh once more, and the RAFians slowly began to quiet down.

“So,” Phoenix said, “I guess that concludes the awards ceremony. Again, thank you all for coming, and good night.”

The sound of distant trumpets could be heard over the PA system, followed by an electric piano. As the music played, the RAFians all began to sing:

The winner takes all,
It's the thrill of one more kill,
The last one to fall . . .
Will never sacrifice their will.

Don't ever look back,
On the world closing in,
Be on the attack,
With your wings in the wind.

Oh the games will begin.

And it's sweet, sweet, sweet victory.

And it's ours for the taking,
It's ours for the fight.

And it's sweet, sweet, sweet, sweet victory.
(Yeah!)

And the one whose last to fall,
The winner takes all.

Source song

Wow, this fic was a complete and total ****show. It pretty much didn't go anywhere that I originally planned it to, and it honestly suffered for it. I meant for it to be really comedic and lighthearted in tone, but I guess that in my efforts to keep it from becoming complete and utter crack, it kind of went way too far in the other direction and became way too serious for its own good. Also, there was pretty much nothing that didn't feel like I was making it up as I went along, mostly because that's exactly what I did. The irregular updates didn't help things in the slightest, either. I guess that's what happens when you don't outline anything. I do have an idea for another fic, but I'll make damn sure to make that one actually competent, or at least decent. Until then, peace out, ****es.