Author Topic: Memoirs of a RAFian  (Read 592729 times)

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redtailedsaffa

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Re: Memoirs of a RAFian
« Reply #5430 on: February 18, 2016, 01:10:04 PM »
Living up to that RAFaward. :P

Offline Cloak

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Re: Memoirs of a RAFian
« Reply #5431 on: February 18, 2016, 09:20:44 PM »
I actually forgot about that RAFaward.

New chapter.

CHAPTER SIX:
They Get Lost

It was decided to sent the average mission contingent to investigate. It consisted of Cloak, Dpsb, GH, Hunter, Saffa, and Helen. All they had to do now was find an opening, and entranceway into the tunnels.

Cloak passed something that he did not notice before. It was a missing child poster, and he felt a sense of sadness. It was a boy called Lee Johns, who was missing from his bed about a week or two ago. The boy's picture showed a child with a big build, sandy hair, an impish glint in his eye, and a broad smile. He was really a cute kid, and it was a shame that he was missing and lost.

He remembered when his believed that his mother turned Faith and Shadow against him, thought they hated him. He remembered how his heart felt like it had shattered, how he . . .

No. No, this was not the time for dwelling on that. He must move on. He closed his eyes and used his Earthsight. He was looking for an entrance, and he remarked to himself this was like finding an entryway to the Yeerk Pool. Yeerks seemed to have a proclivity for keeping their Pools in darkened caves and whatnot, unless in times of emergency. At least that's what the RAFian Yeerks seemed to prefer, even the opening of it being a secret known only amongst them. But Cloak knew it was in some proximity to the Archives, only a bit deeper down.

But that was a bit of a disjointed non sequitur. Time to focus on the task at hand.

They were passed by a nondescript man in a pretty standard delivery man getup. Everything about him was so forgettable, it was almost as if it was intentional. Cloak felt something that he didn't like about the guy, but he didn't know why he felt this sudden hostile reaction to a guy he just met. He did not know why this guy just rubbed him the wrong way.

Then he was gone and Cloak was glad.

"This is just an ordinary alleyway," Dpsb said.

"Dylan, Dylan, Dylan," GH said, in his usual jovial manner, "you've been a RAFian long enough to know by now, everything is not what it seems."

"There," Cloak said, pointing to a bricked wall. "That's a false wall. It covers up the entryway to the tun-- no, wait, they're more like chutes than true tunnels."

"How's that any different?" Saffa asked.

"You're about to find out," Cloak said, pushing open the false wall. It opened inward, and the wall was actually heavier than Cloak had anticipated. It would need to be held open.

"Why do I hafta go first?"

"You know what they say, Saffs," GH said, "ladies first."

BONK!!

"Hey! You didn't have to hit me, Saffa!"

"It was an accident. I'm sorry," Saffa said, unconvincingly, as she slid down the chute into whatever this depository was.

"No, you aren't," GH accused, as he slid down after her.

Hunter was next, with Helen following after. Then Dpsb went after. Cloak was last to follow, sliding down the chute not unlike Disney's interpretation of Tarzan.

"Aaah!" an elderly, miserly man yelled in shock. Then he composed himself, and said, "Don't do that again, you lot. You almost gave me a coronary."

"What the --?" Dspb spluttered.

"There are no words," GH said.

"Welcome," the old guy said, wearing a sun visor, "to the Bureau . . . of Lost."
« Last Edit: February 19, 2016, 08:42:46 AM by CloakedFigure »


Book 189: "Shenecron's Pets"
Chapter 4: "First Attempt"
(January 7, 2020)

RAFians Referenced Specifically: Demos.

guitarhero01234

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Re: Memoirs of a RAFian
« Reply #5432 on: February 18, 2016, 10:07:11 PM »
"There are no words," GH said.

Okay, how the hell did you know that was something I say all the friggin' time in real life? There's no way you're not stalking me. :P

Offline Cloak

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Re: Memoirs of a RAFian
« Reply #5433 on: February 18, 2016, 10:11:44 PM »
I believe you said it once or twice in chat.


Book 189: "Shenecron's Pets"
Chapter 4: "First Attempt"
(January 7, 2020)

RAFians Referenced Specifically: Demos.

guitarhero01234

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Re: Memoirs of a RAFian
« Reply #5434 on: February 18, 2016, 10:14:39 PM »
I don't recall saying it, but it's possible. :P

redtailedsaffa

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Re: Memoirs of a RAFian
« Reply #5435 on: February 19, 2016, 08:39:37 AM »
Quote
"You're about to find out," Cloak said, Paul pushing open the false wall.

Who's Paul?

Offline Cloak

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Re: Memoirs of a RAFian
« Reply #5436 on: February 19, 2016, 10:00:04 AM »
A typo. Goddamn virtual keyboard.

New chapter.

CHAPTER SEVEN:
The Bureau of Lost

The whole area was dark, dimly lit by a light colored a cool blue, with a bit of yellow light here and there. But what was more concerning was the mounds and mounds of stacked merchandise in wooden crates. Further Earthsight confirmed that it was indeed junk. Old and forgotten, miscellaneous and many.

The man who welcomed them had a shock of white hair, a clean-shaven face, a sun visor, black gloved hands, a long black coat, gray sweater vest, white dress shirt, and block loafers. He also had some necklaces around his neck that almost made him seem like a homeless man, if his clothes weren't so clean and polished.

"The Bureau of Lost?" Helen repeated. "Like a federal lost and found?"

"Did you ever hear me utter any variation of that word? 'Found'?" he said, saying the word with great distaste.

"You steal the possessions of others," Cloak said, "and you're not even selling it. You're just stacking it here."

"STEALING?!" he said. Cloak saw his nametag said Hermes Hamstern. Then Hoard muttered, "When I took this job, they said not expect any gratitude!"

"Well, that's precisely what you're doing, pal!" Saffa said, unafraid to back down.

"I'm a certified misappropriation engineer!" Hamstern argued.

"Get that certification off a cereal box?" GH asked, pseudo-innocently.

Hamstern swelled like an angry Jigglypuff, but said nothing.

"This can't be legal." Hunter said.

"Of course, it's perfectly legal!" Hamstern snarled. "How do you think we recovered from the depression?"

"You're insane." Helen said, speaking simultaneously with Saffa, who said, "That makes no sense."

"Of course, it makes perfect sense!" Hamstern said, completely ignoring Helen. "If not for us, people would hold on to their belongings until they wore out. And thing do something ridiculous -- like getting them fixed!"

"Yep. You're definitely insane," GH said, agreeing with Helen's assessment. "I doubt losing things stimulates the government."

Hamstern did not deign to reply to this assertion. But he continued to mill around.

"I think we've seen enough," Cloak said. He was fully intending on looking up this Hermes Hamstern person, considering reporting him to the proper authorities. "We'll be going now."

"Go?" Hamstern said, aw if this was a preposterous notion. "I can't let you go topside! There mustn't be any chance of our service being known to the public at large. Imagine them in these halls, whining about lost dolls, moaning about lost change?"


Book 189: "Shenecron's Pets"
Chapter 4: "First Attempt"
(January 7, 2020)

RAFians Referenced Specifically: Demos.

redtailedsaffa

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Re: Memoirs of a RAFian
« Reply #5437 on: February 19, 2016, 10:22:01 AM »
Well, to be fair, before the Great War the rich were really in over their heads with their possessions. And they had too many. The divide was ridiculously large.

Then again I don't think Hamstern was an economics buff. :P

Offline Cloak

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Re: Memoirs of a RAFian
« Reply #5438 on: February 20, 2016, 07:37:50 AM »
Great War?

New chapter.

CHAPTER EIGHT:
Divided

"You can't let us go topside?" Cloak said, rounding on Hamstern with a deliberate slowness, his cloak slicing through the air like a pendulum guillotine with his slow strides toward Hamstern. It was a visual cue of danger. Danger to Hamstern.

Realm Walkers are very much accustomed to coming and going as they pleased. Cloak was no exception. One reason that the Oblivion Gate was considered tk be a very harsh punishment, as they were restrained from doing just that.

"Of course!" Hamstern said, piddling around some pile of junk. "No, no, no, not topside."

Cloak allowed a tense, terse silence, which Hamstern seemed to be oblivious to. Cloak growled dangerly, "You have no idea the powers with which you meddle, do you."

Hamstern said nothing, and had seemed to vanish amongst the stacked junk. He did not reappear, so he considered Cloak of little threat. This irritated him more, despite himself. There was a real danger of Cloak levelling the entire place, unoess the situation was defused.

"Cloak, you need to calm down," Helen said.

Didn't work.

"GH, do the thing!" Saffa said, in a very Varrick way.

GH unshouldered his guitar and played a quick, novel tune. A tune that managed to speak to the Realm Walker. A tune that managed to calm him down, and allow himself to retain control and composure over himself.

"We should explore this place a bit first," Dpsb said. "There might be things of interest here."

"No looting, Dylan," Helen said.

"I wasn't gonna --"

"Dylan . . ."

"No, really! I wasn't --"

"I can tell you're lying," Cloak said, with a halfhearted smirk.

"Oh, okay!" Dpsb.grumbled.

"You're supposed to be a good guy," Hunter teased, "and good guys don't loot."

Dpbs gave Hunter a look. And it was a good thing that Dpsb wasn't a basilisk.

"I suppose that we should split up," Helen said, "if we want to be thorough about this."

"Isn't splitting up a bad idea?" GH said.

"You scared of ol' Hamstern?" Dpsb teased.

"Don't make me slap you, Dylan." GH countered.

So they split up into different directions, and.proceeded with their investigation.


Book 189: "Shenecron's Pets"
Chapter 4: "First Attempt"
(January 7, 2020)

RAFians Referenced Specifically: Demos.

guitarhero01234

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Re: Memoirs of a RAFian
« Reply #5439 on: February 20, 2016, 07:41:47 AM »
I seem to be the only one who ever objects to splitting up. :P

Offline Cloak

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Re: Memoirs of a RAFian
« Reply #5440 on: February 20, 2016, 07:44:05 AM »
Well, you have common sense. ;)


Book 189: "Shenecron's Pets"
Chapter 4: "First Attempt"
(January 7, 2020)

RAFians Referenced Specifically: Demos.

guitarhero01234

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Re: Memoirs of a RAFian
« Reply #5441 on: February 20, 2016, 07:45:47 AM »
Well, that's debatable. ;)

redtailedsaffa

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Re: Memoirs of a RAFian
« Reply #5442 on: February 20, 2016, 08:46:22 AM »
Great War = World War I

And YAASSS I GET A VARRICK IMPERSONATION. ;D

Offline Cloak

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Re: Memoirs of a RAFian
« Reply #5443 on: February 21, 2016, 12:14:36 AM »
Oh. Guess that i didn't need to link it to the wiki then.

New book ideas! Yes again.

  • Book DCCCXCIII: "Speed Suit" -- A husky boy finds a very special suit.
  • Book DCCCXCIV: "Size Matters" -- A small boy finds a very special suit.
  • Book DCCCXCV: "Acoustically Armed" -- A rival of GH's finds a very special suit.
  • Book DCCCXCVI: "Powers of Persuasion" -- A slick, oily man finds a very special suit.
  • Book DCCCXCVII: "Polygraph Man" -- An anarchist finds a very special suit.
  • Book DCCCXCVIII: "Luck of the . . . Perish" -- An unlucky loser finds a very special suit.
  • Book DCCCXCIX: "Persistent Papparazzo" -- A paparazzo finds a very special suit.
  • Book CM: "Glitchy" -- A gamer finds a very special suit.

Year 10.

  • Book CMI: "Melt With You" -- A very angry, but misinformed, youth finds a very special suit.
  • Book CMII: "One-Man Army" -- A friendless man finds a very special suit.
  • Book CMIII: "Heart Swap" -- A lonely boy finds a very special suit.
  • Book CMIV: "You're Getting Sleepy . . ." -- A failed hypnotist finds a very special suit.
  • Book CMV: "Mumsy Dearest" -- An old foe and a notorious hag unite in a very uncomfortable relationship, and the RAFians must stop them.

Don't think I rehashed anything, but if I did, I'll find a way to work around it. I think.
« Last Edit: February 21, 2016, 08:02:06 AM by CloakedFigure »


Book 189: "Shenecron's Pets"
Chapter 4: "First Attempt"
(January 7, 2020)

RAFians Referenced Specifically: Demos.

guitarhero01234

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Re: Memoirs of a RAFian
« Reply #5444 on: February 21, 2016, 12:32:49 AM »
  • Book DCCCXCV: "Acoustically Armed" -- A rival of GH's finds a very special suit.

UGH WHY DO ALL THE BOOKS THAT HAVE MY BACKSTORY HAVE TO BE SO FAR IN THE FUTURE? :P

Also, I can only imagine that this rival is Chad Kroeger from Nickelback.