Richard's Animorphs Forum
Animorphs Section => Animorphs Role Playing => Topic started by: Estelore on June 05, 2008, 12:44:40 PM
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This is a collective story, more than an RPG. I start, and someone else picks up from where I leave off.
The back story: we're all on a cook-out, frying fish and roasting hotdogs and marshmallows, sitting around a big ol' bonfire, sharing stories of the crazy things that happen in RAF. Estelore begins to recount a particularly screwy tale of RAFian mischief....
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Hey, guys, do you remember that time that we proved that Jax wasn't a Yeerk? We kidnapped him from Jayne's house and tied him up in my closet, as I recall. Held him there for a week, we did, until he started foaming at the mouth. Then he bit me.
Wait...wasn't that that dog that we picked up?
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No, that was me. I don't know how you could have mistaken us, I mean really! And dragging me out the house like that?
Anyway, after I bit Estelore, we went and got Jax and tied him to a chair in a rundown shack in the woods. I remember cause me and Duff took turns guarding him.
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Yeah, and we gave you that rule sheet and pinned it to the wall...It said:
1. Don't take him to the Gap, McDonald's, or any other known pool entrances...
2. Don't loosed the ropes.
3. Don't fall asleep...
You know, when me and Estelore went back to check on you guys, that list was gone...What happened to it?
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Wasn't on my shift. In fact I came a little early that last day and didn't hear a peep out of that cabin.
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Yes, after a month I had realized it was absolutely useless to try to convince Duff to take me to McDonald's every few days...
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Who's shift was it when we found Jax floating on his chair in a pool?
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Oh, that was my shift of course. *shiftty eyes*
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Anyway, after that we didn't let Duff watch Jax. In fact, now we had to prove that Duff wasn't a Yeerk, either.
So...we drugged them both and carried them in a shipping crate out to Area 51, where I unveiled to the guards my true form, frightening the wits out of at least one of the poor chumps. He wet himself.
Good times.
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You didn't have to change the guys pants.
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Point taken.
(Hey, Jayne, is that Marvin the Paranoid Android in your signature?)
Well, after THAT fiasco ended, we took Duff and Jax to see the Andalite toilet in Zone 91...which may or may not exist.
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ha, i thought it was marvin too!
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Maybe cause it is. ;D
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Yaaay! Another H2G2 fan! WOOHOO!
Ahem. Back to the story.
Who wants marshmallows? Any takers? *chucks a flaming marshmallow, which was previously NOT flaming, but which combusted upon contact with a Star, at Shanker*
*doesn't pay attention to see if he ducked*
Obviously, we couldn't let two potential Controllers leave Zone 91 without being sure of them, so we tied them each to a chair, using Coca-Cola to perform Chinese Water Torture.
'What is the answer? To the Life, The Universe, and Everything?!'
'42, you freak! It's 42! Let me outta' here!'
And that was just the guy that wet himself. You don't WANT to know what we asked Duff and Jax.
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You know I still think asking Jax about the panties was a bad idea...
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So do I, but don't tell Duff!
Remember the thing that he said about S& M...you know...Squash and Melon...I'll never eat a fruit salad again!
That probably should have been the first clue that he WASN'T a Yeerk....
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I thought it was when he saw that slug and ran away screaming like a little girl...
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Um... but then again he ran away screaming like a little girl when he saw an actual girl so.... yeah.
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That's Jax for you. Poor little gay boy...
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Hey, now. That wasn't nice.
But neither was the time I pantsed him...so, ye' know...it's all good.
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haha or the time we convinced Jax that Duff was totally in love with him. Remember? He actually went and locked lips with Duff, right out of the blue, and then Duff flipped! Good times..
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He woulda done it anyway...
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True true. But I think Duff enjoyed it...
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Of course he did, I am an amazing kisser. ;)
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As horrible as it is, I can vouch for that. Jax is a really good kisser.
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*eyes bugging out*
Whoa...waitwaitwait!
Jayne! Story! NOW!
I MUST KNOW!!!
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As horrible as it is, I can vouch for that. Jax is a really good kisser.
Unfortunately, I'll never get know for sure. :( :)
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Um...*awkward silence*...
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Did everyone forget that we got married once?
Seriously, in real life.
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Jayne...Oh, Jayne...STORY! NOW!
Me=nearly dying of curiosity.
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I know I've told you this before, but oh well.
We went on a road trip to Las Vegas after we graduated. We then got very drunk and shambled into one of those drive through type chapels (no we weren't driving). It took about a week to get it annulled, which we had to lie about some stuff so that we wouldn't have to get divorced cause that would be a pain. We almost went with it though, for tax benefits.
For the sake of anyone reading this, this is not part of the story, it really happened.
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When you told it the first time, I thought that you were kidding.
SOrry. :P
Back to the story!
Duff and Jax both seemed rather into it, so we had to pull them apart, 'cause I was getting worried. Unfortunately, I shoved Duff into the nearest tree (because I was trying so hard to separate them), and he got a six-inch splinter stuck in his rear end.
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I of course ended up having to remove the splinter. That's about the time that the Zombies showed up.
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Wait...do you mean Rob Zombie, or the ACTUAL zombies? 'Cause we met both of them, y'know.
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Rob Zombie came the next week, remember? These were the actual zomies. and man, they were awful.
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Oh yes, most horror movies fail to depict just how much they reak. I mean, they're dead for crying out loud. A zombie can never sneak up on you, you can smell them coming from a mile away. For some strange reason there's always a peice of their thigh missing too, making them so slow a mile away is plenty of warning.
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They also made that annoyingly loud moaning sound...or was that Jax...?
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Actually I think that was Duff.
And that smell was that case of a a gross of rotten eggs they had on base for some reason. Lucky for us all the zombies ended up cracking 'em otherwise they would have eaten Toomin.
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He DOES look more edible than the average human....
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I was drunk that night, so all I really remember was seeing Jax rubbing his ear alot (heh tv show)
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Well, that's cause Duff's moans were so loud.
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Yeah, that's right.
It's too bad kenny got bit, least I think he did...
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Yeah, he did, but it wasn't the zombies. It was Anna.
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Who may or may not have had Rabies at the time...so, of course, we ALL had to get vaccinated...OUCH.
Then, the zombie crickets attacked after I stomped them, but that's another story, for another time.
After the crickets, Richard Simmons showed up.
Naturally, to save ourselves, we had to call in Chuck Norris, and the resulting explotion of Awesome and Anti-Awesome caused the deaths of an entire herd of Caribou.
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Which were all resurrected and added to the army by the Necromancer Cricket of Doom.
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Naturally, we couldn't just allow an army of zombified, brain-eating arctic deer to run rampant on the world, so we simply launched them all into space (with a little help from my pal Louie at NASA), keeping one to use to threaten Jax into admitting that he was a Yeerk.
Apparently, the zombie Caribou couldn't find anything inside his head to eat, though...so that idea just didn't work out so great....
(Kidding, kidding. :))
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Well they couldn't find anything in his head because he morphed you. BURN!!!!!
Oh my. What have I started..........
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ouch. estelore, do you need some ointment for that BURN???!!!
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Well, as burns go, I AM a star, so it's a fairly commonplace experience for me.
The reason he couldn't find anything in Jax's/my head: my brain isn't located in my HEAD. ;)
Anyway, by that point, Rob Zombie showed up, along with Bob Marley and Carol Channing. THAT was when things got interesting.
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Mostly because we all got higher than telephone wires just off of Marley's aura. At that point I realized I could draw reality and started designing myself wings with built in radios that played the Beatles.
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Then, Carol Channing had to give Toomin CPR, because he had had a heart attack upon meeting his idol.
It wasn't pretty.
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I think that's when Jax started that huge musical number, I still don't know where those backup dancers came from, not to mention Robert Downey Jr.'s kazoo solo...
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Perhaps I was just lost in the CPR but I was baffeled at how he played it through the suit............
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Now that you mention it, that WAS a bit uncanny....
Anyway, Ellen DeGeneres shows up, OUT OF THE BLUE, and the back-up dancers all commit suicide instantly, because they will never gain the fame that she has gained for dancing.
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Well all of them except the one blond guy Jax was snogging, I don't think he care much.
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Yeah, but didn't he turn out to be one of the old Backstreet Boys?
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No, his name was Rafe, and it turned out he had this cute little birth mark on his-
Well, that's for me to know. ;)
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(Nice of you to join us, Jax!)
Oy...I'll just let you keep NOT telling us where the cute little birth mark was....
Anyway, after that the nuclear explosion went off at the nearby testing facility, and we all had to be treated for radiation poisoning and burns, even though I absorbed virtually all the energy involved.
Stupid Human quarantine laws....
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Yeah, sorry, it's hard to pay attention when {Content blocked for Estelore} of course we still ate all the cupcakes.
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{Thanks for blocking the content. My mind is corrupt enough. ;)}
Yeah, but I think that someone might have put ex-lax in the cupcakes...or that could have just been the rad-poisoning messing with his system...'cause Duff was running for those bushes in a HURRY!
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Really? I could have sworn he was running from my Pookie (current avatar) It sure was fun messing with that life form creator...
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(Where did you get your avatar? Me=wildly curious!)
Good point...of course, he could have been running from Anna, too.
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(Spore Creature creator, it's awesome! I'll make you one for you if you want.)
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(Sure, if it en't much trouble! It sounds terribly interesting.)