Author Topic: Song of the Warrior  (Read 3163 times)

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Offline Shenmue654

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Song of the Warrior
« on: December 01, 2011, 02:41:49 PM »
((This is something personal. Very personal. The complicated emotions surrounding a complicated life. But I'm posting it here out of context anyway. The poem is awesome. ;p))

I hear the song of the warrior.
Proud and beautiful and true.
I hear it when the voices of the halls are all dead
And the once shining swords are caked with dust
And only mockery comes upon the noble old house
Through which ran the bravest of men.
I can hear it beating in the dark.

The warrior was strong and brave and mighty
He loved all and feared nothing
He triumphed over all who would torment the weak
And the light of his sword blazed through the night.
He was beloved by everyone who heard
His proud voice that echoed for miles around.

One day a stranger came into the house
A stranger arrogant and cold as death
The warrior welcomed all and turned away none
Yet even he was disturbed by the callousness.
And ever slowly as the days past by
The stranger poisoned the warrior’s heart.

The warrior in his mind began to fear
The whispering voices of others that said
Terrible things about him, things not true
The demons that lurked behind the shadows.
The warrior’s mistrust ripped away
At all the glory he had found.

Soon the halls were empty
And the warrior aged
And people began to fear
That once bright place in the sun
The home of all things good
And all things good are mortal.

Yet the stranger could not take away
The shining light that warrior had
His belief in kindness and his belief in hope
For all the walls that he had built
Still he stood straight and tall.

I hear the heart of the warrior.
Proud and beautiful and true.
I can hear it beating in the dark.

Offline Myitt

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Re: Song of the Warrior
« Reply #1 on: December 03, 2011, 04:48:05 PM »
And so modest, too... ;) Seriously, though.  Very powerful imagery.


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Offline Shenmue654

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Re: Song of the Warrior
« Reply #2 on: December 04, 2011, 03:05:41 AM »
Yeah. I was in a strange place when I wrote this, the best place when you want to write. And as all things are with me, all of it was true. Regarding specifically what this poem is about, my feeling has changed though. I have become aware of once again one of the shining things I love. People are people, but it hath never left me. I don't think it could in a thousand years. My paranoia is old and forged in stone, even with all the help I receive.

 





« Last Edit: December 04, 2011, 03:10:02 AM by Shenmue654 »

Offline pyrebird

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Re: Song of the Warrior
« Reply #3 on: December 08, 2011, 07:58:30 PM »
Dude, are you even from the same century, Kelbells? Also, that was beautiful. I can't write poetry worth a... a, uh, guano. (Hahahaha, I said "guano". Bluh.)
I am a little Meglet, I came here to roleplay. And armed with walls of text here, I'm ready to go play!
Meglet, Meglet, Meglet! She came here to roleplay! And with these walls of text here, she'll go and post away!

[Congratulations to weathel for correctly guessing that it was the Dreidel Song!]

Offline tklp58

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Re: Song of the Warrior
« Reply #4 on: December 13, 2011, 07:16:22 AM »
I’m glad you have posted this here as well as at Deviant. Otherwise I would never have seen it. I keep coming back to it, and I don’t exactly know why. I dislike poetry as a genre. Particularly Klingon poetry, which all begins to look alike very, very quickly. Unless it is some combination of raunchy, rhyming, and scathingly satirical, I do my best to avoid it. Color me philistine and proud of it.

This warrior is the only one I’ve ever seen who had a genuinely happy life. She lived, loved, and died with enthusiasm. No regrets, nothing wasted, and her death was a successful and meaningful sacrifice. She didn’t die just because Klingons are supposed to want to die. The entire poem exhibits a distinct lack of bluster, braggadocio, and BS in favor of an *honesty* I have only seen once, in Faye’s “Death Song”.

I appreciate the warrior becoming a moon spirit, watching over her home forever. It builds upon the motif of “the naked stars, each one remembering,” even/especially when no one else does. It’s a concept I have taken to heart over the years but have never successfully been able to incorporate into my own writings.

Offline Shenmue654

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Re: Song of the Warrior
« Reply #5 on: December 13, 2011, 02:26:15 PM »
O__O Wait. Wait. What you're saying is VERY important.

Are you saying you have seen this poem at Deviantart somewhere? ...........if that's true, then someone stole my work and used it to their own ends. On this very website.

................

..........because I never posted it there. I posted it in ONE other place, and it had nothing to do with Klingons. Though I can see how this would be suited to that purpose. It refers to my own father, in metaphor.

EDIT: ............oh. Poem with the same name, sort of. Good grief, people. The least you could do is actually READ the poem before posting. -____-;;;
« Last Edit: December 13, 2011, 02:32:53 PM by Shenmue654 »