(Okay so this is a metaphor for a problem in my family that won't go away....but it makes no sense. XD Read it anyway. My feelings come out. I actually wrote it months ago, but it seems relevant again now.)
There is a gap in the sea.
I can see it sometimes, as I peer over my ancient boat into the water’s edge. My boat is peerless despite its age. It has weathered a thousand storms or more, as eternal as the follies of men. I gained passage long ago, through a means I cannot recall. Nonetheless it and I have worn all weathers well.
The seas move seamlessly in two different directions, away from the gap that separates them. They don’t want to confront it, for neither wants to face the truth that they are made of the same foam and air and water. Instead they slam against it, waves cresting across their calm surfaces.
They trifle over salt content as if it were sacrosanct, as if in being one thing or another they can escape their nature. My boat will one day, in the face of the greatest and most devastating Storm of all, fall into a watery Abyss deeper than any I have seen. It will know no mercy--- Charybdis takes no prisoners. We lie in wait for it, for the glory of riding the whirl pool down into the very bottom. Front of the ship face first into Death with honor. To do otherwise would be to say that our journey meant nothing.
Yet I do not want to leave the water as it is, when I go. In truth I can do nothing--- It will make its choices without me. I only sail through it and its storms, as I always have done. Yet nonetheless…..On lonely nights on this ocean….It haunts me still.
I scream at the night, pleading with God to mend it….but I never had that leverage.
I only have my boat.